Dear Editor:

I was at the SDDC meeting and it felt like we were nominating Fidel Castro to yet another term. There was little discussion and not enough time was allowed to fully answer members questions. As a member of the club, I felt the meeting was an exercise in heavy repression——a forum for Mr. Whitburn only. As an employee of the American Red Cross, an organization that firmly bans gay men from donating blood, Mr. Whitburn and his club created enough bad blood to last well beyond the 2008 filing deadline.

Terry E. Abrams

Dear Editor:

We have all heard the infamous line, “there is too much money in politics.” In San Diego, one can go a step further to say there is too much Developers’ money in politics. As a constituent in Council District 3, I’m never sure whether my representative is making the best decision for our community or for someone who provides funding for their campaign.

A political race is very much like a horse race. We put our money or votes on the person who we believe will benefit us the most. So, why would a developer not put their money on the person that benefits their interest? At the end of the day, the politician has a wonderful situation. If the public loves the politician, then their chances of gaining a greater political post are quite good. If the fickle public decides it does not like the politician or the politician gets into hot water, then they always have the private sector. Ask Michael Zucchet (former Council Member District 2). He is now working as a consultant for a local developer. So, in short, a sound political strategy might be to ride it out as long as you can because a developer will be ready to catch you.

I’m not sure if our political candidates for Council District 3 are ready and willing to serve this community. We certainly know that they are ready because they have announced their candidacy. So perhaps we need to establish a test of their willingness.

So, my challenge to Todd Gloria and Stephen Whitburn is make a “No Developers” contribution pledge. That would mean you will not accept contributions from a developer or if you have, you will return it. What do you have to lose? Most if not all of the major developers live outside District 3 and would not be able to vote for you. Let the developers know our community is NOT FOR SALE.

Forgive me, but I’m a skeptic. But with rare exception have we not seen a politician turn their backs on this community. Good Luck Guys.

John Taylor

Dear Editor:

I am writing in response to the coverage around Stepping Stone. I was the agency’s HIV/Alcohol and Drug Counselor from 2005-2006. We all want what is best for the residents but differ on how to accomplish this goal.

As a certified Alcohol and Drug Abuse Counselor, I believe a true commitment to recovery will come when a person faces real consequences - because pain is the greatest motivator to change. Even love is not enough to motivate a person to change, or parents wouldn’t have such a hard time motivating their children to stay sober. Sometimes, the most loving and least enabling thing to do is to allow an addict to face the negative consequences of his or her choices.

Recovery programs everywhere are struggling to balance the needs of maintaining structure in a residential community with individualized treatment plans - as the country moves towards a clinical model in substance abuse treatment.

The problem is complicated legally with regards to whether a resident can be discharged to the streets. Having said this, I believe a resident should be discharged for breaking sobriety in residential treatment, and staff should follow up with the resident after he or she leaves treatment.

This allows for discipline and also allows staff to continue to help the resident who has been discharged.

Many times professional boundaries demand clinicians to cease all contact with residents when they leave treatment. But I believe following up with a resident, whether they have completed the program successfully or not, is professionally ethical when it is done to help the client and not to fulfill the counselor’s needs.

Individual treatment planning is always needed because every client has unique needs. But I also believe a residential treatment setting also demands some non-negotiables - such as sobriety - to minimize chaos and keep structure.

I hope Stepping Stone continues to thrive as it serves a great community purpose, and I believe in its work. I also believe in the work of its long-term volunteers, such as Alice and Ross Henry, who have put their hearts into their efforts without financial or personal gain - a powerful example of what recovery is about: One addict helping another without expecting anything to return. In the Big Book of Alcoholics Anonymous, they refer to this as the altruistic movement.

Recovery homes should seek to strike balance between the clinical boundaries and the altruistic movement. Boundaries are needed, but staff and volunteers should be able to help residents when they have been discharged - regardless of the circumstances.

And let us not forget the only one in charge is God. Everything happens for the greater good. I hope Stepping Stone staff, volunteers and residents - past and present - know that God is taking them all to a better place as a result of all this. Myself included.

Scott A. Giordano

Dear Editor:

When is our own LGBT community finally going to grow up?

Ron deHarte’s comment in the Union-Tribune regarding Pride Night at the Ballpark was as insulting and small-minded to me as the religious group that is protesting. He said, “We’re going to be wearing ball caps and jerseys. That’s the extent of the lifestyle they will be seeing.” What, is he so embarrassed by the non-straight-acting parts of his own community he’s forgotten some of us who DON’T fit his stereotype might actually attend the baseball game?

What happened to our own LGBT community that we are so willing to “play it straight” and cater to their ideas of what is appropriate demeanor and behavior? Why are we allowing intolerant people put us in yet ANOTHER closet when we’ve struggled so long to expand their comfort zones? Why are we so scared to actually BE proud even when it isn’t convenient for them?

They are saying to us, “You embarrass us. Your behavior is unsettling. Abide by our needs and behave like us so everyone can feel comfortable. You are not like us so I should not listen to you, nor value you, nor respect you.”

We’ve learned that so well we’ve now internalized it! And reprimand ourselves! Have the last 38 years since Stonewall simply demonstrated how well we can fit in and pass? And should? To make them feel better that we’re “okay”? We’re “normal”?

How is any of this different from our society before 1969? Aren’t there others who still experience this every day? What mental harm does it cause them? What disintegration of spirit, destruction of joy and internal happiness that we all strive for and deserve...

Honestly, shouldn’t one’s appearance and demeanor really mean less than who they are inside? Have we truly not learned that yet? Apparently not… Why is that so scary to teach young people? Why are we afraid to actually demonstrate intolerance is wrong? EARLY? Maybe some of their own struggles growing up wouldn’t be so difficult…

I think our community and Mr. deHarte in particular have forgotten what Pride is for. Do we put it away only to dust if off once a year to celebrate how wonderfully tolerant we all are? So it’s okay to be who I am but only within parameters the rest of the year? “Straight” parameters? C’mon… Doesn’t that sound oddly familiar?

How can we inflict self-hate, doubt, guilt and fear back on ourselves so easily and thoughtlessly when our own cultures, churches, social institutions, families and even friends have already done it to us for centuries? Physically and mentally, at the cost of too many lost and wrecked lives…

Where is our self-confidence? How can part of us be acceptable and tolerated, and the rest of us STILL aren’t? Even to each other?

Perhaps we ARE embarrassed and uncomfortable. Obviously the straight community is. Good! Maybe ALL OF US should consider if we’re as embracing of difference and diversity as we think we are…

Corey Johnston