ARLINGTON, Texas (AP) – Relatives of a gay Navy veteran who died say they are upset that a mega-church led by Joel Osteen’s brother-in-law canceled his memorial service 24 hours before it was to start.

Officials at the nondenominational High Point Church knew that Cecil Howard Sinclair was gay when they offered to host his service, but no one hinted of problems while planning it, said his sister, Kathleen Wright.

“But when the obituary came out in the paper and listed his life partner as one of the survivors, I truly believe the big-pocket parishioners called the church and said, ‘Why are you having a funeral for a gay person?’” Wright said Friday. “It’s a slap in the face. It’s like, ‘Oh, we’re sorry he died, but he’s gay so we can’t help you.’”

But the pastor, the Rev. Gary Simons, said no one knew Sinclair was gay until the day before the Thursday service, when staff members putting together his video tribute saw pictures of men “engaging in clear affection, kissing and embracing.”

Simons said the church believes homosexuality is a sin, and it would have appeared to endorse that lifestyle if the service had been held there. The family had asked for an outside officiant – a gay men’s chorus conductor – and an open microphone for anyone to speak, he said.

“We did decline to host the service – not based on hatred, not based on discrimination, but based on principle,” Simons told The Associated Press. “Had we known it on the day they first spoke about it – yes, we would have declined then. It’s not that we didn’t love the family.”

Simons said the decision had nothing to do with the obituary and that no church members or ministers commented on

it.