It was painful to listen to the public comments on the friend-of-the-court brief Tuesday. Residents weighed in on San Diego’s support of San Francisco’s challenge to the ban on same-sex marriage licenses. The opposition outweighed the support, and it spread an ugly misrepresentation of the GLBT community.

Same-sex marriage would lead to the destruction of society and moral law, those who opposed the item said. Children would be misled and poorly parented by same-sex couples, they said. The GLBT community is characterized by people who troll public bathrooms for sex, abuse drugs, and live in their cars, they said. Love in a same-sex relationship is not authentic, they said.

GLBT community members maintained their dignity throughout the hearing and swelled with pride when the council voted 5-3 to sign the amicus brief and support the challenge to the ban of same-sex marriage licenses – but Mayor Jerry Sanders’ pledge to veto the item loomed, and the community knew it.

We were prepared to take the strong mayor to task – to shred his character and attack his politics.

But the mayor had a change of heart. In a call to our office Wednesday morning, the mayor confirmed he had changed his position and he hosted a press conference in the afternoon to announce he would support the council’s decision to approve the amicus curiae, or friend-of-the-court brief.

He said it was “the right choice.”

“I have decided to lead with my heart – to do what I think is right – and to take a stand on behalf of equality and social justice,” Sanders said. “The right thing for me to do is to sign this resolution.”

At the press conference, Sanders acknowledged his daughter Lisa, a lesbian, and people on his staff who are members of the GLBT community.

It was the first time, to our knowledge, the mayor has discussed his daughter’s same-sex relationship.

Mayor Sanders, you have made us proud.

Along with Police Chief William Lansdowne, the Gay & Lesbian Times recognized Sanders as Person of the Year in 2006. Sanders blasted the suspects accused of attacking six gay men outside the Pride festival last year, calling them “cowards,” and pledging to protect the safety of the GLBT community.

For that, he was worthy of our recognition.

The mayor again had choice words Wednesday.

“The concept of a ‘separate but equal’ institution is not something that I can support,” he said.

He lived up to our expectations. In the face of adversity and monumental pressure from the right, he took a stand for our constitutional rights and for justice.

He legitimized our battle, locally and statewide, to be afforded the rights heterosexual couples enjoy.

He risked his standing with conservative constituents to support GLBT civil rights; to say our community counts; that our love is, in fact, authentic, and should be recognized.

In the 1990s, Councilmember Harry Mathis, a lifelong Republican who didn’t abide by dogma and the proud father of a lesbian, cast a swing “aye” vote in favor of domestic partnership. Today, Mathis says he stands by his vote, that justice was served, and said, in part, he followed a simple philosophy when he voted: “From a political standpoint, you can’t be two people,” he said. “You can never divorce yourself from being a father.”

Mayor Sanders, in the face of the tremendous criticism you will face today for your support of the amicus brief, take comfort knowing that you did not separate yourself from this item – that you signed a resolution that will enhance your daughter’s life. Take comfort knowing you helped write history. Take comfort knowing that same-sex couples, mothers and fathers and children will, hopefully, be afforded rights in the future they aren’t afforded today. Take comfort knowing that, in a decade or so, you’ll know you served justice.

Jerry, thank you.