I’ve just returned from judging the 2007 Mr. Toronto Leatherman Competition. Before I get to the meat and potatoes of the contest let me tell you a few things about Canada.

First of all, gay men and women can get married there. They don’t have “husssbinsss,” “husbears,” domestic partners, live-in lovers or extended tricks – they have husbands with all the bells and whistles one would expect from a legally recognized marriage. The U.S. gives us “domestic partners” like a bone and we just roll over and take it up the ass instead of fighting for our right to marry – but, that’s another column.

The Canadians can also take it up the ass, legally. They have clean, well-lit bathhouses because they were wise enough to realize the baths can be used to educate people about risky behavior and safer sex. Gay men are going to have sex because we’re men and that’s what men do. We’re born to spread our seed and the hotter the receptacle the more seed we spread. The Canadians also have very active back rooms, particularly in the leather bars. But wait – in Canada they have heterosexual bars with back rooms! How progressive is that? Straight people having sex!

The Grey Cup, which is the Canadian Football League version of our Super Bowl, was taking place in Toronto the same weekend as the contest so the city was overflowing with loud, drunk, testosterone-driven heterosexual males. I was definitely tempted to see one of these straight back rooms firsthand but decided it might be too much even for my sick and twisted mind. Of course now I’m thinking that was a bad decision!

I was in Canada to serve a purpose and being the “icky” guy in the corner of a back room or bath house watching other people have sex was not that purpose. The Mr. Leatherman Toronto contest is one of the most respected competitions in the world and it’s an honor to sit on the judging panel alongside some of the most respected leather people in the world. MLT is a bit different than our Mr. San Diego Leather, although we’ll be stealing some of its ideas in the future. It awards three titles during the weekend: Mr. Leatherman Toronto, Mr. Leather Fellowship (a.k.a. Miss Congeniality, but with duties and respect, selected by contestants) and Bootblack Toronto.

The contestants were Mr. 101s Leather, Fenn (just, Fenn); Mr. Churchmouse & Firkin Leather, Matt Pavelich (yes, Churchmouse and Firkin – still don’t know what that is); Mr. Woody’s/Priape, Laurence Heath; Mr. Alibi Leather, Dean Rose (he’s on Naked News); and Mr. Spearhead Leather, Marc Paquet-Decker. Usually in a leather contest with five contestants there’s one or two good ones, one that’s just OK and the rest totally suck. Any one of these guys would have made a great Mr. Leatherman Toronto and I’m not just saying that. One of the judges asked each of them for a one word description of each judge. One called me “tricky,” one called me “smiling,” and one called me “hot.” I heard nothing after that. My one word description of each contestant is: Fenn, “young”; Matt “energetic”; Laurence, “mature”; Dean, “professional”; and Marc “French.”

We chose Matt Pavelich as Mr. Leatherman Toronto 2008 with Dean Ross and Fenn as runners-up. Laurence Heath is Mr. Leather Fellowship and Toronto Bootblack is a very sexy man called “Black-Jack.”

Thank you to the stepping down Mr. Toronto Leather 2007, Mr. Steve Martin and his legally recognized husband/slave, Peter Rex (Mr. Steamworks 2007 – yes the bathhouse) for their hard work and hospitality. Although it was an extremely busy weekend they hosted me in their three story, 30th floor penthouse home for my last night in Toronto. I now love Canadian football. BTW, they raised more than $9,000 in a car wash – a friggin car wash!

A big “thank you” to chief judge, Peter Kincheloe and the staff and organizers of Mr. Leatherman Toronto. This is one weekend that should definitely be added to any leather person’s travel “to do” list. Mark your calendars next Thanksgiving weekend and check www.mrlt.com for more information.

I have to go back to bed. Write me at inthepitsd@aol.com. See you “In The Pit.”