“It’s not that hard to attract hot guys. All you need is one of two things – beauty or bucks. You’ve got beauty. But I’ve got bucks!” – Michael Huffington (former spouse of Arianna) tells a very good-looking passerby how he happened to be in the company of the hottest boys on the beach in Provincetown on the Fourth of July.

Welcome to Billy Masters’ Best of 2007 column, where we look back on the year that was … and give a tantalizing glimpse into the future. While I traditionally gather with loved ones to eat cobbler and watch Lindsay Wagner movies on New Year’s Eve, others go odder routes. For example, Barbara Walters, Cindy Adams and Judge Judy rang in 2007 together with a moonlight dip in a hot tub – in the nude! On the other end of the spectrum, soap actor Drake Hogestyn was accosted at his Malibu home by a crazed fan trying to exorcise the devil from him. I don’t know which scenario was scarier, but no one gets hurt with cobbler.

“The View” was news all year long, proving that the 11-year-old gabfest is still as relevant as ever. Rosie was in, then she was out. Then Whoopi was in. Then Kathy Griffin was almost in – but the money wasn’t good enough (and, to be honest, she didn’t want to be locked in to the show). Sherri Shepherd’s negotiations went on longer than expected, but she was finally in the week after Whoopi. Then Elizabeth Hasselbeck shocked us by saying that because heterosexuals have destroyed the institution of marriage, it’s difficult to deny homosexuals the chance to give it a try. Maybe Rosie did some good after all.

While Jennifer Hudson was accepting her Oscar for Dreamgirls, the original “Effie,” Jennifer Holliday, was across the street – on the roof of the Roosevelt Hotel, singing “And I Am Telling You.” A few months later, Holliday was back playing “Effie” in Atlanta for a 25th anniversary production. Hudson better watch out, lest this be a glimpse into her future.

Holliday wasn’t the only diva to hit the stage. Joan Collins and Linda Evans joined forces for a seemingly endless national tour of the abominable play, “Legends!” The real drama took place off-stage, as Joan’s published diary recounts numerous nasty encounters with Linebacker Linda.

Patti LuPone fulfilled a lifelong dream by headlining a limited run of Gypsy in New York. Unfortunately, it wasn’t Broadway … yet. She gets a full-scale production at the St. James Theatre starting in March – and will undoubtedly win a Tony in June.

Daniel Radcliffe stripped for a U.K. production of Equus. Unimaginable as it may seem, no video footage has surfaced. All we’ve got is a slightly fuzzy photo of his nether regions. When the show hits Broadway later this season, I have faith that my fellow Americans will rectify that situation.

Gay events were teaming with mainstream celebs. I brought Sharon Stone onstage while hosting L.A. Pride. Later in the year, Dame Elizabeth Taylor returned to the stage for the first time in two decades to perform “Love Letters” alongside James Earl Jones on World AIDS Day. And Kathy Griffin memorably hosted the GayVN porn awards in San Francisco.

Speaking of gay porn, a number of our boys went legit. Wilfred Knight was featured in a Madonna video. Luca DiCorso modeled sunglasses for Tom Ford. Cole Tucker turned up selling real estate on Flip That House. Johnny Hazzard modeled for Heatherette during New York Fashion Week. Colton Ford released an album. Ben Andrews and Erik Rhodes were featured in ads for Loehmann’s. And Benjamin Bradley modeled in his underwear. OK, so that last one wasn’t much of a stretch.

Each year, we lose people close to us. Alice Ghostley, Beverly Sills, Merv Griffin, Darlene Conley, Robert Goulet and Brett Somers were only a few of the luminaries to pass away.

But no celebrity death was bigger news than Anna Nicole Smith. It wasn’t necessarily a surprising death, but it was shocking nonetheless – even to moi. Anna and I weren’t best friends, but I always found her to be fun, sweet, and kind. Alas, those qualities got lost in the midst of the mudslinging that came out in the numerous court cases and inquests. When it came to rumors, Rita Crosby dropped a bombshell when she claimed that Larry Birkhead and Howard K. Stern were gay lovers – a rumor I’ve never been willing to dismiss. It’s been given some credence after a male model claimed to be Larry’s ex-lover! Kerrick Ross says he dated Larry back in 2000 when they both lived in Louisville, Ky. Usually what happens in KY, stays in KY – if you use enough KY!

Our bread and butter are the naughty photos and videos that surfaced. This year, a large cylindrical object in Prince Harry’s shorts got people talking. Then there were the full frontal shots of Shemar Moore frolicking on a nude beach (the gay part of the beach, but he swears he didn’t know). And “Project Runway” star Jack Mackenroth showed all in a steamy pictorial, prior to voluntarily leaving the show.

But my favorite photos aren’t nude at all – they’re the snaps of Oscar de la Hoya dressed up in fishnet stockings, wig and a tutu! He may have tried to squelch the pics, but they are alive and well!

Even more popular are videos. This year had an assortment of exclusive performance clips (mentioned above). But there are a few that warrant special mention. Enrique Iglesias serenaded a young Filipino boy with “Hero” onstage at Club G-A-Y in London. Johnny Galecki and Tom Everett Scott hopped into bed together in The Little Dog Barked on Broadway (and Galecki is very well-endowed).

But, once again, the Brits have us beat. First came a video of three members of the Sunderland Football Club taking turns having sex with a very enthusiastic female fan – while another thoughtful member videotaped the encounter. Then there was the Sandbach Rugby Team, which was featured on a U.K. documentary, Generation Xcess. This flick showed the boys walking around their locker room aroused, “dropping trou” on the dance floor, and even sucking on each other’s nipples. Let’s see some members of the Patriots top that!

I went through all my blind items for the year, and this one jumped out at me – primarily because I couldn’t remember who it was about:

Could it be that a certain former sudsy stud has returned to his old habits – in more ways than one? Sure, the work is good for the current kiwi, but recreating that iconic body image has been a bit of a chore. Rather than go the bulimic route (again), he’s gotten hooked on crystal meth – which is de rigueur given the boys he’s partying with. With his Cheshire smile, he’s never been at a loss for male companionship – especially guys who are willing to eat him alive.

When I can’t even decipher my own blind item, it’s definitely time to end yet another year of columns. I have to say this has been a great year gossip-wise. And maybe 2008 will be even better. If you have any questions, feel free to drop a note to Billy@BillyMasters.com, and I promise to get back to you before I eat my weight in cobbler – or sleep with a cobbler! Until next year, remember, one man’s filth is another man’s bible.