Wendy Sue B, describes herself as a 48-year-old, Jewish, Aries Dianic Witch Fyre-Goddess, Mistress, Wild Child, “Earth-Mother Goddess Bitch Mistress from Hell.” Stereotypical she isn’t, but Wendy Sue makes no apologies for who she is, what she likes, and the experiences that have shaped her into the womyn she is today.

Wendy Sue identified as a “radical feminist dyke” at age 16, and has a long-standing love affair with all things leather, BDSM, kink, and fetish.

She was the first open leather dyke to volunteer at The Center, serving as a panelist on its speakers bureau, a peer counselor and the Lesbian Rap Group facilitator. She has also been a member of the Los Angeles Womyn’s S/M group, Leather and Lace, LARAWW and San Diego Leather and Sister Hood. She’s a founding mother of San Diego activist groups Queer Nation, ACT-UP, Lesbian Avengers, has been a part of organizing almost every Dyke March in San Diego, and from 1985- 1992, she coordinated security for the San Diego LGBT Pride Weekend events, and served on the LGBT Pride board in 1987 and 1988. Basically, the woman is a badass.

“My draw to kink and leather was sex. I think it’s my draw to its creativity, and the play,” Wendy Sue says. “I use that in a number of senses; one, because I’m a creative person drawn to theater and costuming and love of history. I also like to play – and part of that play is sexual play, sensual play, and exploring who we are as people and who we are as women, and as lovers. BDSM is erotic for me. I think I also come from a generation that came after the sexual revolution of the 60s. We’ve learned a lot from those who were exploring their sexuality [during that era] and some of us took it a step further. For me, it was BDSM. BDSM is about sensual and sexual exploration. I connect it with the idea of trying all 131 flavors of ice cream to see what you like and what you don’t like.”

“I’m drawn to it on so many different levels,” she said. “There are spiritual levels and emotional levels, and like I mentioned earlier, I’m into play and creativity. It’s not so much escape as it is exploring other realms outside of the day-to-day things you do in life. I’ve found that people in the scene, and this might sound cocky, tend to be a bit more intelligent then people who aren’t [in the scene]. I find that a lot of us like to explore life and [BDSM] is part of that exploration – it’s about exploring sensuality and sexuality, and how the mind, body and spirit work together.”

Wendy Sue and others in the women’s leather community who embrace BDSM have faced criticism – how, they’re often asked, do self-proclaimed feminists embrace a BDSM lifestyle.

Bondage, discipline, dominance and submission, sadism and masochism (BDSM) runs the behavioral spectrum of punishment, role play and a variety of other activities.

Feminism, on the other hand, comprises a number of social, cultural and political movements, theories and moral philosophies concerned with gender inequality and equal rights for women.

Women in the BDSM community have defended their right to enjoy the lifestyle, going so far as to publish a book of collected essays titled Some Women. Against Sadomasochism was written by feminists who criticize women, in particular lesbians, for participating in S/M. One of the feminists’ primary arguments, is that dominance/submission relationships are hierarchal, which some believe is in opposition to women’s fight for equal rights.

Wendy Sue says feminism, however, has allowed her to explore her sexual, sensual side, and she has managed to reconcile her feminist views with her BDSM lifestyle.

“It’s feminism that gave me permission to explore the world as an independent, lesbian woman,” she says. “It’s feminism that gave me permission to explore myself and the choices we as women can make for ourselves.”

Other women in the leather and BDSM community share Wendy Sue’s progressive attitude toward feminism.

“For me, being a feminist means I can be whatever I want,” says Bikkja Amy, Ms, Southern California Leather 2006. “I think the rules of being a feminist have changed over the years. My sisters before me, Wendy Sue, [my partner] Naria B. Jordan and thousands of others, have paved the way for me, a youngster in this world, to be whom and what I want to be. I get to engage in and play with whom and what I want to, and negotiate for.”

Wendy Sue and Bikkja both said they’ve never been conflicted to reconcile their feminism and the leather lifestyle.

“I have never experienced inner conflict as they do not need to be mutually exclusive,” said Bikkja Amy. “The biggest struggle I do face though is with employment – trying to stay true to who I am, and not having work judge it [my lifestyle] as negative. As with many people, I know that work and my life after work are all different aspects of my life, and for me do not intertwine.”

“It’s a cliché, but being into BDSM isn’t about having power over someone -– it’s instead a power exchange,” Wendy Sue says. “For me, playing with women is not about having sexual power over her – it’s about the exchange and seeing where we can both go together. On a spiritual level, letting sexual energy out between me and another women, I envision it as a circle, or sphere, of energy where we’re each putting energy in and pulling energy out. It’s a give and take, and about seeing where we can go together. It’s about how much can my partner take – and what she is willing to take from me, and what I’m willing to give her, and what she’s willing to receive.

“I love the women to bottom to me, who serve me. I respect them. I honor them, because they’re opening themselves to me and they’re willing to give me everything I’m willing to take from them. And for someone to unzip themselves and say ‘here I am, take me’ is such a powerful and amazing experience. She wants me to explore her body and see what her body can do, and we go on to an adventure together. It’s fun.”