Halloween is near, but if you don’t have your costume planned yet, do not fear – Queer Abby is here! Wondering what you and your girlfriend should dress up as when you strut your stuff to Nightmare on Normal Street? Here are a few fabulous lesbian-friendly costumes:

Lindsay Lohan and Samantha Ronson: C’mon, admit it – who doesn’t want to be this A-list lesbian couple for just one night? OK, maybe me … and you. Still, Lindsay and Sam make for a great costume idea!

What you’ll need: For Lindsay – a long red-headed wig, a DVD of The Parent Trap or Mean Girls, skinny jeans, and a bottle of booze or a bag of incriminating white powder. For Sam – a short, bleach-blonde wig, a black hat with a feather on it, skinny jeans and a few records to DJ with.

Sarah Palin and pregnant daughter Bristol: OK, so she makes your blood boil – but that doesn’t mean you can’t dress up in her likeness for Halloween! Sarah Palin and her daughter, Bristol, make the perfect Halloween costume.

What you’ll need: For Sarah – rimless glasses, a beehive with bangs, a hockey puck and a sign that reads, “I can see Russia from my house.” For Bristol: a big, pregnant belly, algebra books, a McCain-Palin pin, and the facial expression of a deer caught in headlights.

Ellen and Portia: You can be the happiest (and wealthiest) lesbian couple on earth for a night! And even better – the costume is easy as can be!

What you’ll need: For Ellen – a short, blonde wig, khaki pants, a t-shirt and blazer (or sub sweater vest), and sneakers, of course! Note: you MUST dance in this ensemble. For Portia: a long, blonde wig, a wedding gown (think glam!), an Ally McBeal DVD, and a vegan cookbook.

So there you have it … Three perfectly easy, lesbian-friendly Halloween costumes. Make sure to check out the end of this column to see where you should go once you’re sportin’ them!

This Friday, Oct. 17, L-Word star Leisha Hailey visits San Diego when her band, Uh Huh Her, plays the Belly Up Tavern in Solana Beach. See “Alice” up close by paying $15-$17 per ticket. Showtime is 9 p.m. Openly bisexual singer/songwriter, Missy Higgins, performs at the Belly Up on Nov. 12 with Joshua Radin (the songwriter who performed at Ellen and Portia’s wedding). If you haven’t yet checked out Missy Higgins, you must! This is going to be a fantastic show, and I already have my tickets! Tickets are $15-$17 and doors open at 8 p.m.

Are you looking to connect with other lesbian and bisexual women without the loud music and drama found in clubs and bars? How about over a glass of wine? “Wine, Women and Whatever” is a new ladies’ event taking place at Tango Wine on Saturday, Oct. 18. There is a $20 fee per person to cover wine and corkage fee. Reservations are recommended! For more information, visit www.gaylesbiantimes.com/links/1086.

On Wednesday, Oct. 22, Lavender Lens magazine will sponsor a Women’s Health Discussion at The San Diego LGBT Community Center at 7 p.m. The topic of discussion will be “Live Your Healthiest Life: How to maximize our health through the foods we eat.” Healthy refreshments will be served. For a link to R.S.V.P., visit www.gaylesbiantimes.com/links/1086.

Do you like to watch movies and eat popcorn with other women? Then check out Sapphic Cinema, the Women’s Resource Center’s film night featuring movies by, for and about queer women! Saphic Cinema takes place on the fourth Friday of every month, at 7 p.m., at The Center Sapphic’s Oct. 24 film is Kissing Jessica Stein. This is a free event, with snacks and refreshments available. All proceeds will benefit the Women’s Resource Center. Check it out … you might just meet someone at intermission!

If you love playing poker with your friends, why not play AND raise money for a great cause at the same time? On Saturday, Oct. 25, there will be a co-ed “California Hold ‘em” Poker Tournament to benefit the Toni Atkins Lesbian Health Fund. This unique fund was established by The Imperial Court de San Diego and The Center to assist low-income and uninsured lesbian, bisexual and transgender women in accessing necessary health care resources. Lessons start at 6 p.m. and the game begins at 7 p.m. More than $1,500 in prizes paid to the top five and pizza sponsored by Transamerica. This and other Hold ‘Em fund-raisers are held at the Moose Lodge in Golden Hill. A $25 donation is required by state law.

The L3 (Ladies, Laughter and Literature) Book Club will host a reading by author Victor Villaseñor on Wednesday, Oct. 29, at 7 p.m. at The Center. Villaseñor is a Mexican-American writer living in Oceanside, Calif. His first novel, Rain of Gold, chronicles the journey of his family from Mexico to the United States and is a must read for everyone in Southern California. Crazy, Loco Love is a compelling memoir of his adolescent search for meaning and identity as he grappled with his sexuality and spirituality. After speaking to the audience, Villaseñor will be available to autograph books and answer questions. This is a free event; all are welcome!

And last but not least, before you vote on Nov. 4, learn about the amazing women who made it possible! The Women’s Resource Center presents a free screening of Iron Jawed Angels on Thursday, Oct. 30, at 7 p.m. at The Center. Hilary Swank leads an outstanding cast in the inspirational true story of two women who dared to make a stand for women’s rights, and ended up shaping the future of America. Snacks and drinks will be available. Let’s get inspired to VOTE!

Every Friday is ladies’ night at Bourbon Street for Ladies Happy Hour from 4-7 p.m. and a live performance by Lauren DeRose at 6:30 p.m. in the front bar. Enjoy a game or two of pool or darts (my favorite) while you’re there, and munch on the free popcorn, too! This is one of the best spots to meet other women in San Diego.

Looking for some afternoon fun? The T-Dance takes place every third Sunday of the month, from 3-6 p.m., at Numbers. Join women from all around San Diego for this afternoon dance party on Sunday, Oct. 19. Drinks specials abound – you must be 21 to enter!

Do you have a weakness for girls in uniform? Friday, Oct. 24 is “Military Misses” night at G-Spot at Numbers. Doors open at 9 p.m., and there is no cover with military ID before 11pm. Hip-hop and house will be bangin’ on the dance floors and the Lipstik Inc. Girls will be dressed in their military best! For more information, visit www.gaylesbiantimes.com/links/1086.

If you are looking for the ladies on Sunday afternoon, The Brass Rail is the place to be. Doors open at noon so girls can get their game on; beer pong, flip-cup, ping-pong, Guitar Hero … you name it, they’ve got it! With 50-cent beer specials, it’s the perfect afternoon destination!

Soulkiss Ladies’ Lounge takes place every first Friday of the month at Kadan so check out this hot night on Nov. 7! DJ Dopeshoes rocks the house with special guest DJs spinning the hottest hip-hop, neo-soul, dancehall and more. This is a 21-and-up event and there is no cover.

Come see how Hillcrest celebrates Halloween at Nightmare on Normal Street, The Center’s annual ghoulish street party! This 21-and-up event will celebrate the diversity of our community and raise funds for The Center’s more than 40 programs and services! You can dance to DJ Steven Oliveri and kick off your Halloween festivities with a Stone Brewery Beer, Tommy Bahama Rum, or a shot of Jägermeister! The party takes place on Halloween night, on Norrmal Street between University and Blaine, from 7-10 p.m. Entrance is $5 and you can win $1,000 in cash in the costume contest! Don’t miss this event – the costume-watching alone is priceless!

Once you’ve finished your Jäger shots at Nightmare on Normal Street, meet up with other costumed women at G-Spot at Numbers for a night of “Hocus Pocus!” There will be free Jell-O shots, a fabulous contest, Lipstik Inc. dancers and more!

Or head over to UCSD’s Porter’s Pub (Eucalyptus Grove Lane and Gilman Drive) to see lesbian rapper, MC Flow, rock the mic with The Kneehighs. This is a hip-hop Halloween party, so wear your most pimpin’ costume! This is a 21-and-up event and doors open at 8 p.m.

Then the next day, just when you’re thinking of packing away your Halloween costume, throw it back on and head over to the FlawLes Night After Halloween Party at Saylula Downtown in the East Village. The party starts at 8 p.m. and will feature a live performance from LDR and the Kates. Make Halloween last a little longer this year, thanks to the ladies of FlawLes!

That’s it for October, ladies! Have a happy, haunted Halloween and I’ll see you next month!