Three San Diego City Councilmembers are on trial because they allegedly received money from owners of strip clubs to rescind laws that prohibit “lap dances.”

The councilmembers claim that a police vice officer duped them into believing this was a policy supported by SDPD. A vice officer lying to generate evidence for a conviction? Welcome to the gay world. Even an ultra-conservative California Supreme Court said a few years ago that police officers have historically lied and used laws to harass gay men.

The lap dancing scandal is ridiculous for a variety of reasons.

The California Court of Appeal held last year that lap dancing is protected as a form of free speech. This is especially so in forums where alcohol is not sold.

Unfortunately, the California Supreme Court, rather than take the politically charged case, let that decision stand, but ordered it depublished. This means it’s binding only on the parties, so city attorneys can go on enforcing laws that are unconstitutional. No, I am not making this up. It’s ludicrous. But remember that the last recall in California involved four California Supreme Court justices.

Here’s the real rub. A few weeks ago many San Diegans enjoyed a production of Naked Boys Singing at the Spreckels Theatre. One of the naked actors walked into the audience and hugged a few panting men. The actor’s penis was not erect; I haven’t a clue about members of the audience. But there was no run on Viagra during intermission. Had this same act occurred at Cheetah’s, the actor/dancer and the patrons would have been arrested for crimes. And our city attorney might even make them register as sex offenders.

Over the last thirty years, the U.S. Supreme Court has struck down efforts by cities to ban nude plays. The First Amendment protects nude theatrical entertainment. The same reasoning applies to dances at a strip club, including lap dances.

Notice that the venues I’ve mentioned don’t serve alcohol. The Supreme Court has held that the Constitution allows states to completely regulate alcohol, even banning it should a state choose. So states can limit the sale of alcohol connected to nude entertainment.

Notice that gay and lesbian bars don’t feature nudity, just wet underwear contests.

And then, of course, there are “private sex clubs,” not open to the public, where anything goes. If a gay man wants to see naked men, he can simply go to a gay bathhouse … er … health club.

If a straight man wants to see a naked woman, he doesn’t have much choice in San Diego, except to go to an alcohol-free strip club.

A few years ago the city council studied proposals by SDPD to ease some of the adult-entertainment restrictions. But by the time the measures reached the city council, some were even more draconian than the existing measures.

Leading the effort to press for stricter standards were then-councilmember Rev. George Stevens and Juan Vargas. Only then-councilmember Christine Kehoe inquired about how these laws would impact women strippers. The strippers opposed the restrictions because, naturally, they can charge and make tips from lap dances. And, shocking as it may seem, many of the women in the profession have husbands and kids to support — and some of them (I know) are teachers. Many are lesbians. Even Gloria Steinem, who has championed women’s equality, worked as a Playboy bunny in her younger days.

Instead of decreasing vice laws, our city council voted for increases. A few weeks ago the L.A. City Council did exactly the same.

But the owners of the strip clubs in LA raised $100,000 and, by working together, in 28 days they collected 107,000 signatures to force the city council to rescind its law or hold an election, which would cost the cash-strapped city at least $5 million. The signature-gatherers only needed 57,000 signatures, but said they had lines of people ready to sign the petitions. Why? People were outraged that the city wastes money on this stuff.

Police in Los Angeles assert that strip clubs bring increases in prostitution and other crimes. But cities can use zoning powers to restrict adult businesses to non-residential areas. And when any business becomes a nuisance, the city has the power to abate that nuisance.

It’s unlikely that the San Diego City Council will touch adult business-related ordinances during the current scandal. But, as the fires that ravaged San Diego show, we don’t need emergency workers sitting in strip clubs when we don’t have enough fire fighters.