The United States is one of a handful of countries in the world that have an official holiday recognizing fathers. On this third Sunday in June 2004, children everywhere — of every age, ethnicity, race, creed, color and sexual orientation — will take time to honor their fathers.

The tradition of setting aside a day for dads began nearly a century ago when a woman named Sonora Dodd proposed the idea for a Father’s Day holiday to President Woodrow Wilson. In 1909, as Dodd sat listening to a sermon honoring mothers, she could not help but think of her father, William Smart, a Civil War veteran who was widowed when his wife died giving birth to Dodd’s youngest sister. Smart raised his six children alone on a rural farm in eastern Washington State.

In 1916 President Wilson went on record approving of the idea, and in 1924 President Calvin Coolidge proposed a national event to “establish more intimate relations between fathers and their children and to impress upon fathers the full measure of their obligations.” Finally, in 1966 President Lyndon Johnson signed a presidential proclamation declaring the third Sunday of June as Father’s Day.

There has been a great deal of national debate surrounding the concept of family values. But behind the words and the debate lies actual people with actual stories full of every conceivable emotion.

The Gay & Lesbian Times decided to go out in the community to find out how we feel about our fathers. As it turns out, GLBT youth were the most vocal. Five of them – Adam, Scott, Cindy, Mark and Karla (not their real names) all have very different relationships with their fathers, but there is a common thread among the five teenagers — they all came out to their fathers in the last few years.

Adam, 16, came out to his father two years ago. In less than 24 hours, Adam was on the street. Scott, 16, came out to his father six months ago. His father chaperoned him on his date to a school dance with his boyfriend. Cindy, 18, came out to her father about a year ago and was subsequently kicked out of the house and sent to live with her mother. Mark, 15, came out to his father last year and was told, “It’s just a phase. You haven’t met the right girl yet. You are too young.” Karla, 18, came out to her father last year, following both her brothers’ announcements that they are gay.

The teens’ reasons for coming out to their fathers are as personal and unique as one would expect.

“I wanted my dad to know the whole me,” says Cindy. “I was always ‘daddy’s little girl.’ I was his ‘little princess.’”

Cindy’s dad didn’t take the news well. “He freaked,” says Cindy. “He just kept walking around my bedroom shaking his head, denying it.”

But Cindy was adamant. “I told him, ‘There’s nothing that changed. I am still me.’ He couldn’t understand that. All of a sudden his little princess in pink became a dyke.”

Adam understands.

“It sucked,” says Adam. “I told my dad I’m gay, and, like, it was no big deal to me. We had been really close. I played school [base]ball and he was always at the games. After I came out, he just went ballistic. He started shouting about how no son of his could be gay. Finally, I just left.”

Adam became one of more than 2,000,000 homeless youth in the United States, an estimated 40 percent of which are lesbian, gay or bisexual. He sank into a deep depression as he floated among friends’ homes, never really finding a place. On several occasions, Adam says, he contemplated suicide.

And Adam was not the only one. Even Karla, whose father has been very supportive, considered suicide.

“I thought about it,” says Karla when the discussion turns to suicide. “I really didn’t know what I was going to do.”

Karla, however, feels fortunate that her brothers paved the way.

“Thank God my brothers were both gay,” says Karla. “They both came out to my dad together. They sort of teamed up on him. I guess they both knew about each other and decided that it was better if they both told him at the same time.”

Scott says he knows of at least two or three gay, lesbian or bisexual youth who were not as lucky as Karla.

“I think if your parents reject you, you really don’t know what to do,” says Scott. “I know I am very lucky to have a dad that understands. I mean, like, how many dads do you know who would chaperone you on a date with your boyfriend?”

Scott’s dad did, however, lay down some pretty explicit rules.

“No drinking, no drugs and no kissing,” says Scott, laughing. “I think he wanted to say, ‘No sex,’ but couldn’t bring himself to think about it. But that’s cool. I don’t think any dad wants to think about his 16-year-old son having sex.”

Mark says the jury is still out on his dad’s reaction.

“He really thinks it is just a phase,” says Mark. “One of his favorite expressions is, ‘If I had a dime for every time this-or-that,’ so I said, ‘Look, dad, if I had a dime for every dad who has said they thought it was just a phase …’ I don’t think he thought it was very funny at the time, but I think it did make him think.”

In a time when the television is filled with images of brave soldiers fighting abroad and children eulogizing our 40th president, Adam can’t seem to find the words to describe the contrast of his life with the images he sees daily.

“I keep wishing that my dad was the kind of guy that I could call a hero,” says Adam. “I mean, I used to be the star in the family. I was totally a jock. You would think with all the [things] happening in the world that my dad would be glad he had a son.”

Things are easier for Scott — and he knows it. “My dad has to drive me to school every day,” says Scott. “We have, like, this special handshake thing we do every morning. He’s totally cool.”

Even when Scott brought home his boyfriend, his father was accepting — not thrilled, says Scott, but accepting.

“My dad isn’t, like, jumping for joy that I have a boyfriend,” says Scott. “But he knows that I am happy and so he accepts that [my boyfriend] makes me happy.”

For Cindy, having one parent who is accepting this Sunday will be plenty for her.

“When my dad sent me to my mom’s house to live, I thought that was it,” says Cindy. “What I realized, though, is that my mom could be both a mom and a dad to me. In fact, I plan to make her a Father’s Day breakfast.”

Karla plans to spend Father’s Day with her father — who just recently became a grandfather.

“My oldest brother and his partner adopted two kids earlier this year,” says Karla. “So it is their first Father’s Day. It is funny, really, because after my brothers told my dad they are gay, he was like, ‘Well, that sucks, but at least Karla will have kids.’ When I came out to him, he was like, ‘No way. Who’s gonna call me grandpa?’”

For Mark, whether his dad comes to accept his sexuality or not, Father’s Day will always be an important day.

“Even if my dad totally kicks me out, I will still love him as my dad,” contends Mark. “I mean, it can’t be easy. I just hope whether he is okay with it or not that he doesn’t mind having his son love him.”

And loving a father who has rejected you isn’t easy, says Cindy.

“You know, ever since I can remember, I was ‘daddy’s little girl,’” says Cindy. “I really couldn’t believe it when my dad freaked out when I told him. I know that he’s just disappointed, but I really want him to still think of me as his little girl. Sometimes I just tell myself that if it wasn’t this, it would be something else. You know, like, he wouldn’t approve of the boy I wanted to marry, or something. I just tell myself, it’s the same thing, it’s just that he won’t approve of the girl I will want to marry.”

Ever since he can remember, Adam says, his dad was protective.

“I remember when I had a fight with this kid at school in like, fourth or fifth grade,” recalls Adam. “My dad didn’t even stop to ask what happened. He just charged into school and started yelling at the teacher about how his son was such a good kid and how this other kid should be suspended. My dad didn’t think I could do anything wrong.”

So how does Adam think things will go from here?

“Well, I hope my dad can understand that I really haven’t changed,” says Adam. “I think it is hard for people like my dad who grew up with this idea that, like, guys have to be really butch to be real guys. I just hope he understands that I can like baseball and boys.”

Mark still holds out hope, too.

“I think my dad is the kind of guy who has to think about things for a while,” says Mark. “I think if he thinks about it and realizes that my life is going to suck enough without my own dad dissing me, then he will hang in there. He is really important to me, and I don’t want to lose that.”

Karla completely understands.

“My dad is so important to me,” says Karla. “I mean, like, without him, who is going to walk me down the aisle?”

As for Cindy, she is content to celebrate her mother this Sunday.

“I don’t think you have to celebrate your actual father on Father’s Day,” says Cindy. “I think you should celebrate whoever fills that role. I mean, just because it is my mom who provides for me and helps me with my algebra — I mean, that’s enough to celebrate at least two holidays for her.”

Even though Adam isn’t necessarily sure where he is going to be on Sunday, he does keep a positive outlook.

“If there is one thing my dad taught me,” says Adam, “it is that when I have kids, if one of them says they are straight, I won’t freak out!”

Regardless of how their fathers may be involved in their life, one fact remains — Adam, Scott, Cindy, Mark and Karla will all be thinking about their fathers.

Maybe not in the same way Sonora Dodd did, but they will think about their fathers just the same.