In 1974, Kevin Tilden says he was probably having dinner with his family. They had just moved to Seattle, Wash., from Hunstville, Ala. Twenty years later, Tilden headed back to the South, to Arkansas, and finally came to San Diego. In short order, Tilden became deeply involved in politics — helping to bring fundamental changes to the dinner table conversation.

Would anyone recognize Kevin Tilden on the street? As Tilden receives the distinguished Community Service Award at the Pride rally this Friday, he may be the most invisible visible activist in San Diego.

“Frankly, I prefer to work behind the scenes,” explains Tilden. “I am always deeply embarrassed by public awards. Being recognized publicly is always awkward for me. I even blush when I get a thank you note from someone.”

Tilden is the first to admit, though, that modesty does not equal timidity.

“I like to win,” says Tilden. “I am motivated by the idea of winning. That is why I think I really like politics. There is a clear deadline and a clear verdict on whether you have won or lost.”

Winning seems to be the only thing Tilden accepts. He has worked on campaigns for Assemblymember Christine Kehoe and Deputy Mayor Toni Atkins (including Atkins’ recent re-election win in the March primary), as well as District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis. Tilden served two years as a board member for the San Diego Democratic Club and on the Clinton/Gore Presidential Transition Team in Little Rock, Ark., from 1992 to 1993.

So when will Tilden’s name appear on a November ballot?

“Serving in an elective office is not something I would be good at,” says Tilden. “I would not enjoy it. I would rather work to help someone else get there rather than be the face. And we have such an embarrassment of riches with so many people in our community who are very committed to their causes and interested in public service.”

For Tilden, time is another important point.

“Things are moving so quickly these days,” says Tilden of the LGBT political scene. “Just look at the young people today. I think an amazing thing about gay marriage is how a person’s opinion is directly proportional to their age. Young people in high school are asking, ‘Why wouldn’t gay and lesbians be able to marry?’ As these young people move forward, maybe in a generation or two, the people who are in office, both here in San Diego and in the United States as a whole, will not be making the decisions.”

For Tilden, all politics are local.

“Look at Bonnie Dumanis,” says Tilden. “I mean, for Bonnie to win a countywide position as a Republican, Jewish lesbian is incredible. Having representation is so important. It doesn’t just give us a seat at the table, as they say. Frankly, it changes the whole dinner conversation.”

Tilden points to the various victories the GLBT community has experienced by having more than just advocates of GLBT issues, but also having elected members fighting for the community.

“With Kehoe on the city council, we ended up with domestic partner benefits,” says Tilden. “We can learn firsthand our freedoms by having people from our community holding elective office.”

Taking GLBT issues to the national forefront has been fundamental in changing the conversation as well, argues Tilden.

“I think there are two major flurries of events that have really impacted the political landscape,” explains Tilden. “The first is the national discussion around whether gays and lesbians were fit to serve in the military. The impressive part of this debate that the newscasts failed to mention back in 1992-1994, say, is the fact that we were even discussing gay and lesbian issues. Just the whole idea of using terms like ‘gay’ and ‘lesbian’ around the dinner table. Just hearing people use the words was amazing, really.”

The second flurry, as Tilden states it, is the recent U.S. Supreme Court decision of Lawrence and Garner v. Texas, striking down the state’s sodomy laws.

“The Lawrence case and the marriage decisions come together at a very exciting time,” says Tilden. “I actually like that [President] Bush mentioned civil unions versus gay marriage. I mean, the discussion suddenly is no longer the presumption of eligibility, but rather either-or, not if. In fact, it is more like, ‘If not, why not?’”

And while people like U.S Representative Barney Frank and San Francisco Mayor Gavin Newsom may be the faces of the arguments, there is always someone like Tilden behind the scenes, rallying them forward.

“As time moves on, the number of people that are talented, that are really out and committed to justice grows and grows and grows,” says Tilden. “That is the great thing about these awards. It’s really more like a relay race, where everyone has to take their turn in order for the whole team to be successful. How successful we are has to do with how the team in front of you did.”