“The ideal in society is to raise children with a man and a woman,” President George W. Bush said responding to a question on a Florida law that prevents gays and lesbians from adopting children. Excerpts from the exclusive Oval Office interview appeared in the Jan. 28 edition of the New York Times.

“As president, I will always be aiming for the ideal. I don’t know about this particular case…” he said in declining to comment on the particulars of the case that the U.S. Supreme Court recently declined to accept.

Bush went on to say, “I believe children can receive love from gay couples, but the ideal is – and studies have shown that the idea is where a child is raised in a married family with a man and a woman.”

But in fact, that isn’t exactly what the studies do show. Most of the work demonstrating the benefits of male/female parenting compared that with single parent or divorced situations where it was clear that the emotional and financial support of two parents was beneficial.

The few studies that have looked at the children of same-sex couples have found the kids to be statistically normal in terms of their developmental issues and problems. However, those studies have looked at only small numbers of gay and lesbian families and only over a short period of time.

“There is not a single legitimate scholar out there who argues that growing up with gay parents is somehow bad for children,” Judith Stacey told the Times.

The New York University sociology professor has conducted a literature review of those studies. “The debate among scientists is about how good the studies we have really are,” she said.

“Myths should not dominate discussions about gay, lesbian, bisexual and transgender families,” said Winnie Stachelberg, political director of the Human Rights Campaign. “Adoption should be about what is best for the child, not appealing to a political base. … With so many children in foster care in need of permanently nurturing homes, it’s critically important that we put science before ideology when making family policy decision.”

What has been largely overlooked in this debate is Bush’s use of the term “gay couples.” It is a shift in tone for an administration that seldom uses the word gay, more often referring to homosexuals. Furthermore, he acknowledged that gays can make loving parents, albeit perhaps not the ideal. But he also implied that the ideal is not always possible. Surely James Dobson is biting his tongue.