Gym Scaredycat

Dear Scaredycat:

Last week, the Wall Street Journal had a terrific article that cited three 2005 studies that show that aerobic exercise and weight lifting are effective at decreasing depression, and there are no side effects. The article said that, for some people, three hours of exercise a week is even comparable to taking medication for depression. The article also cited surveys that showed that once you get started, you often get hooked. Why? Regular exercise reduces depression and improves your mood.

Now, let’s look at your motivation, or lack of it. Ask yourself why you go; this will help get your butt off the sofa and into the gym.

How about getting some help with this? Like everything else in life, you can “do” the gym all alone, or you can get help and support.

Trainers: Often you can get some free advice, but, remember, they make their living doing this stuff. Talk to a trainer to see if you can afford to get some help, especially at the beginning, when you want to learn the “right” way to do things, so you don’t injure yourself.

Friends: You probably know people who will support you in going, go with you, can give you suggestions on exercises to do, how to use equipment, etc. Having a gym buddy is a great way not to flake out on going. And it’s more fun.

Ask the other gym-goers for suggestions. You’d be surprised how kind and sweet some of the biggest, toughest-looking gym hunks are. Most people at my gym are very helpful. In fact, it is flattering to ask someone for help. It makes people feel good to give help and it is a joy to receive great, free advice.

Watch what other people do. This may be obvious, but many people are so creative that they used machines and weights in ways that maybe even the trainers haven’t tried yet. The caveat here is that it may look good, but may not be good for you.

In your e-mail, you sound really negative about going to the gym. With that attitude, I doubt you’ll be going for long. Why not go from negative to neutral? Don’t see it as a “life sentence,” see it as “let’s see what I can learn at the gym today” or “how can I make my body happy today?” It sounds sappy, but you need at least a neutral attitude, and preferably a positive one, to change from your old routine.

Find exercises/machines/workouts that you like to do. We all have our favorites, and the ones we hate. On days you can barely drag yourself to the gym, focus more on the things you enjoy. On days when you feel more motivated, push yourself a bit and do more of the difficult things.

Create variety in your gym routine. Boredom is an exercise killer. Read some of the exercise magazines out there (in the library if money is tight) and try some of their exercises.

Stop comparing yourself to others. It can undermine your success. The people you admire may have been going to the gym for five, 10 or 15 years on a regular basis. They may have a completely different body type than you, and they may be really strict about eating healthily. Focus on yourself. Whenever you feel jealous of someone else, remember how far you’ve progressed from where you used to be.

And, finally, here’s the truth about thinking that other people are looking and laughing at you: they’re not. A wise personal trainer once told me that most people go to gyms to work out and focus on themselves. It’s very unlikely they’re paying much attention to you or anyone else. Focus on yourself, praise yourself for going, push yourself a little when you can, get help from others and concentrate on pleasing yourself. The admiration of others will come in its own sweet time. Enjoy getting healthy, feeling less depressed and looking good!