This week, San Diego is hosting the Gay Softball World Series, with thousands of ball players in town…. Please enjoy America’s Finest City, and we are proud to have you with us this week.

In almost 40 years, I’ve never witnessed such an ugly and divisive gathering as happened at this past Monday’s community meeting on Pride. First of all, the facilitator lost all control, and after she said she would not allow “personal attacks,” she let them go on for hours. It was upsetting to hear speakers call Mayor Toni Atkins, state Senator Chris Kehoe and District Attorney Bonnie Dumanis “traitors,” and hear that they “betrayed our community.” These women are owed an apology.

It was obvious to anyone that the Pride board had called up and rallied countless numbers of their volunteers, many of whom shouted at opposing speakers and made personal attacks when they spoke.

I felt bad for Pride spokesperson Phillip Princetta, who is a decent, nice gentleman, but was not prepared for such a meeting. The real leader in this issue, immediate paste Pride board co-chair Joe Mayer – who led these unanimous votes to do nothing – sat quietly. Shame on you. Have you no guts to stand up and speak, since you are responsible for most of the Pride board’s decisions?

As for the personal attacks on me, after 40 years, it just reminded me of meetings where Act Up and Queer Nation would attack me – same behavior. I am proud that I treated those with whom I disagree with respect, and refused to attack anyone personally.

I want to make it clear that I respect and honor all the hard work that our Pride volunteers do. We all appreciate them. But this wasn’t and isn’t about a Pride coup or takeover, but about changing a Pride board that has “lifetime emeritus members.”

Pride board, you are very mistaken if you do not realize that a great majority of our community, its businesses and organizations have lost confidence in you. This has not ended, and I’ve received countless phone calls and messages from people who were there or did not make it.

I do want to state here and now that I do not support those who are organizing a letter campaign to Pride sponsors or are working to start an alternative Pride. I believe we should still try and work on getting new board members, and make sure they are “independent.”

I do want to thank those speakers on the opposing side of the issue who were civil and stuck to the issues… but they were only a few. The meeting’s facilitator let this forum turn to chaos, and then called for a vote late into the meeting after many had left. From all the phone calls I’ve gotten, this past Monday’s meeting in no way ends this Pride controversy.

For many years, Suanne Pauley has served San Diego Pride with distinction and a hard work ethic. I have considered her a friend, and we have gotten along well. This year she has made some mistakes, and I have disagreed with her on issues, but she followed the Pride board’s directives. Suanne Pauley notified the Pride board on July 3 about those on the Megan’s Law list. The Pride board then sat on this information for weeks. Now Suanne has been forced to resign.

In all my columns and public statements, I have called for the board to resign, not the staff… but it’s obvious that Suanne Pauley was made a scapegoat. Thank you, Suanne, for your years of service and taking Pride to new heights. Know that your work was appreciated.

At this past Monday night’s community town house meeting, a strong Donna Frye supporter stated that mayoral candidate Frye, who supports gay marriage, would perform gay marriages in San Diego…. Is this correct information? While I have heard other Donna Frye supporters state this to me, I have never heard Frye state this in public. Are these rumors true or false?

In case you missed it, Donna Frye wrote a letter to the editor to the Gay & Lesbian Times giving her top five reasons she did not show up for Pride weekend:

5. Up late partying the night before with the pension board

4. Stunt-double called in sick

3. What? You don’t have a Donna Frye impersonator?

2. Was having a “conversation with Nicole”

The number-one reason, and her true reason, was that she said she needed to rest and spend some time with her family, and be prepared for a busy City Council meeting. Donna Frye apologized to those who were disappointed in her, and hoped people would understand. I say let’s move on… I’d rather have her judged on her votes on needle-exchange, the Boy Scouts lease, compassionate marijuana use and her support of gay marriage and our issues than just on missing the parade.

My pal Steve Miller and I stopped by Hillcrest’s annual City Fest and had a really fun time, as this was one of the best ever, with outstanding entertainment and great jazz bands. To see straights, seniors, youth, parents, people of every color and GLBT people all in one place having a good time getting along and being friendly was wonderful. There was fabulous food and it was nice seeing so many friends and meeting new ones. Bravo, Hillcrest Association!

Every year, every restaurant in the city anxiously awaits the prestigious San Diego Magazine’s “Best Restaurants” issue. It is the ultimate dining guide for San Diego, and winners are chosen from the reader ballots and top restaurant critics.

Among the many 2005 winners were gay-owned or gay-friendly restaurants. One of the big winners was Ortega’s Mexican Bistro in Hillcrest (which has only been open for a few months), which won the Best of the Best critics’ award over all other restaurants. Congratulations to John, Juan and staff!

Other 2005 winners were: Best Local Burger Joint, Hamburger Mary’s; Best Late Night Dining, City Deli; Best Thai, Taste of Thai; Best Neighborhood Eatery, Kensington Grill and Adams Avenue Grill; Best Vietnamese, Rice Jones; Best Barbecue, Phil’s BBQ (who else?); Best Deli, D.Z. Akins and City Deli; Best Takeout, Pick Up Stix and Saffron; Best Breakfast, Hash House A Go Go and Hob Nob Hill; Best Business Lunch, Dakota Grill; Best Italian, Arrivederci (whose popular and super-nice owner, Antonio Mastelone, garnered a great color picture of himself in the issue); Best Dining with a View, Bertrand at Mr. A’s; and also winning Best of the Best, The Prado Restaurant.

And, to no one’s surprise, the fabulous Deborah Scott won for Best Chef of the City!

Bravo to all the winners. I’ve eaten at all these places, and the results are right-on.

This year, San Diego’s famous Caliph was voted our community’s most friendly bar, but it’s a lot more than that. Almost every day of the week, it features fun entertainment and good times: Monday night features top pianist Don L.; Tuesday is karaoke hosted by Erik Swanson; Wednesday features pianist Darryl Crone on the keys; Thursday is another fun karaoke night with Erik Swanson; Friday’s pianist Kevin Cavanaugh attracts a crowd; Saturday is the most fabulous Blue Velvet; and Sunday is karaoke hosted by Byron Hunt!

Yes, there’s always something happening at The Caliph every night, and everyone is welcome. They also have a deli with excellent food, and the entire staff under popular owner Sherman Mendoza is super-friendly. Stop by The Caliph for a good time.