This past Sunday was a bleak day for us TV-loving queers. We went about our day with typical Sunday cheeriness, maybe swung by Hillcrest’s CityFest to pick up a knickknack or two, and took our lazy afternoon naps. But when 10:00 p.m. rolled around, we all realized that something was officially missing. That something was “Queer As Folk,” the controversial, groundbreaking, sexy-as-hell Showtime drama that had celebrated its series finale the week prior. At 10:00 p.m., those of us who loved the show took a deep breath and said a final goodbye to our posse of queer friends from Pittsburgh – Michael and his comic store, Mel and Lindsay and their constant dyke drama, and, of course, Brian Kinney and his giant… heart (it did prevail in the end, didn’t it?). Of course, Showtime offered us “Weeds” as a replacement, calling it equally groundbreaking, but let’s face it – until Mary Louise Parker smokes a fat joint and finds herself applying for a domestic partnership with the suburban housewife next door, we’re not even playing in the same ballpark…

Now, practically every gay person I know has a different opinion of “Queer As Folk” and what its portrayal of gay culture has done to either help or hinder our community. Some people despise the show, claiming all it did was air our dirty laundry for all to see. Others say the show redeemed itself in its final season by including political activism and gay marriage issues in its plotlines. Others, such as myself, have loved the entire wicked ride: the sexiness, the sleaziness, the true human emotions and connections portrayed, and the political component.

But regardless of how each of us feels personally about the show, it is impossible to deny the fact that “Queer As Folk” unabashedly broke the mold when it came to portraying full, complicated and developed queer characters on television. There were no dateless and sexless Wills and Jacks dancing at Babylon – instead there was skin and sex, seduction and romance. There were no trite gay characters just there to give makeovers and punch lines; rather, there were complex LGBT characters dealing with issues such as coming out, drug abuse, sex work, gay-bashing and more. “QAF” reflected our stories, our friends and ourselves as we really are: diverse and complicated, flawed but human!

Of course, despite having run its course, the legacy of “Queer As Folk” still lives on in other shows. Would Bravo’s “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” have ever carried that “queer” name had “QAF” not existed first? Probably not. And would Showtime be featuring the lesbian drama “The L Word” had it not experienced such success with “QAF”? I doubt it. “QAF” helped prove that people, gay and straight alike, want to see gay life represented on television, and that they will tune in regularly to see it!

Perhaps this is one reason why we will see so many gay characters and actors on the small screen this fall during pilot season. Here are just a few teasers to get your juices flowing:

“Kitchen Confidential” (FOX, Mondays at 8:30 p.m.) – Gay actor Sam Pancake (yup, that’s his real name) plays a gay waiter working at a popular New York eatery.

“Out of Practice” (CBS, Mondays at 9:30 p.m.) – Paula Marshall (“Spin City”) plays a lesbian E.R. doctor in this new sitcom from gay writer Joe Keenan (“Frasier”).

“Inconceivable” (NBC, Fridays at 10:00 p.m.) – This unique drama about the behind-the-scenes action in a fertility clinic highlights a gay couple having a baby via a surrogate.

“Rome” (HBO, Sundays at 9:00 p.m.) – Return to the days of Julius Caesar in this dramatic look at ancient Rome, said to contain plenty of passion – gay and straight alike.

“Bones” (FOX, Tuesdays at 8:00 p.m.) – Gay actor Eric Millegan plays assistant to Emily Deschanel, a forensic anthropologist with a knack for crime-solving.

Television is getting queerer and queerer by the day, and we have the “family” steering Hollywood and daring folks like Kathy Griffin to thank for it! (If you haven’t seen her new show, “Life on the D-List,” yet, it’s a must-see). But for now, an extra-special thanks goes out to all the folks who made “Queer As Folk” possible for five fabulous seasons. Our hats are off to you! (And maybe our pants, too…)

Dyke March 2005 is just around the corner, taking place on Saturday, Sept. 10! Join the women of V.A.G.I.N.A. for a day of protest, activism, community and culture. For more information, e-mail dykemarch@carambola.org, or join the Dyke March planning committee for meetings on Wednesdays at 7:00 p.m. at The Center.

The Women’s Resource Center will host OUTspoken, a poetry slam in celebration of National Coming Out Day, on Oct. 11 at 7:00 p.m. The slam will have three phases: Oct. 11, kick-off; Oct. 18 semi-finals; and Oct. 25 finals/awards night. Participants may include lesbian, bisexual, and trans artists/performers looking for a place to voice their thoughts and opinions. If you attend T.M.I., Siren, Fusion or Brujas y Bellas, then this slam is for you! Admission is $5 per night or $10 for the three-day event (reduced for performers). Sign up by contacting Claudia Lucero at clucero@thecentersd.org or (619) 692-2077 ext. 206. Space is limited, so sign-up ASAP!

The next Siren Open Mic show is set for Thursday, Sept. 1, at Korova Coffee Bar (4496 Park Blvd.), and will feature So Cal songstress Joanie Mendenhall. The Siren mission is to provide a safe space in which female artists may inspire and support one another via the expression of the creative arts. Each show includes open mic portions, as well as a 30-minute feature performance. The mic is reserved for women. All are welcome to attend and support! Sign-up for the open mic begins at 7:30 p.m.; showtime at 8:00 p.m. For more info, e-mail sheslams@bust.com.

Things are heating up down at Six Degrees this weekend. On Friday night, don’t miss The Tommy and L-Train Show, featuring live music, mayhem and more! The fun starts at 8:00 p.m. so don’t be late.

After the show, the party keeps going. On Saturday, the patio opens at 2:00 p.m. with a $3 barbecue from 4:00 to 7:00 p.m. And don’t forget Sunday… the best day down at the Six…with the beer bust barbecue starting at 4:00 p.m. Why not swing by and support your local ladies’ bar?

Other weekly women’s nights include Ladies Night at Bourbon Street every Friday, featuring a ladies wet T-shirt contest at 6:30 p.m., with $250 in cash and prizes. Happy hour is from 6:00 to 9:00 p.m., with VJ Kenny at 9:00 p.m.

Bad Kitties is held every Friday night at Numbers.

DJ Tova spins every Saturday night at Candy at The Flame.

That’s it for this month. If you’re planning an event you’d like to see listed in Queer Abby, just e-mail it to queerabby@hotmail.com.