Dear Editor:

For all your readers out there who plan to vote for Jerry Sanders next Tuesday, just remember one thing. He’s a Republican. And Republicans do not change their stripes, no matter what they say. Governor Arnold is proving that in California and George “passionate conservative” W. is proving it today, once again, with his nomination of Judge Alito to the Supreme Court. Rest assured, my friends, your vote does matter. It’s very convenient for Sanders to say he doesn’t support gay marriage but will defend our rights otherwise. Give me a break. And when he takes office, San Diego will be yet another pawn in the Republican’s plan. (Ask yourself, who has the most money in this campaign and where did it come from?) Does anyone out there believe that Donna Frye will not solve our financial problems as easily and as quickly as Jerry Sanders? She will, and then we’ll be left with another Republican mayor from San Diego and the fundraising will begin and the Republicans will have one more edge in their goal to win the Presidential race in 2008 in California, with Arnold’s help, of course. We as a city and we as a nation are going to be ruled by the decisions we make next Tuesday. Generations of Americans will be under the thumb of a Right Wing Supreme Court. Just read Judge Alito’s rulings. And if you decide to vote for Sanders, just keep in mind what I’ve written in this letter. Your vote will come back to haunt you. Sanders will ride the magic carpet to higher office, financed by the Republicans.

Donna Frye is on our side. She supports our issues. She will solve the financial mess in San Diego, which was created by Republicans. And she will never betray the gay community.

David Harrington Campbell.

Dear Editor:

[In reference to the Time’s cover story, “The battle over gay teens”]

Oh, if only my generation (early 50’s when I was fifteen. I’m seventy now — ) had had such support groups back when was a lonely teen who thought of myself as a disgusting, repulsive pervert!

There’s much more to be done; here’s two ways that can help.

1) Emulate the Los Angeles-based Gay Men’s Medicine Circle (run by Jungian Dr. Donald Kilhefner), which incorporates many philosophies but starts with the concept of a Gay Spirit, and utilizes much from Native American directions. The GMMC has (among other things) a mentoring program designed to have Elders help Youth, since the Adult group was decimated by AIDS. One of the explorations of this earnest group was done by separating Elders and Youth into different rooms. Each enumerated the gripes they had against each other, then came together again and discussed the surprisingly frank, candid statements made on each side.

2) In this day and age, if parents and parents-to-be want their children to be fully realized individuals, it’s clear they must start considering—even before birth—in a neutral, unbiased way, that the children they’ll raise just may be gay, lesbian, bisexual, or transgendered. This won’t be taught in schools, and from my own experience listening to parents when they didn’t know I knew I was “different,” home is where the hurt is—at any age. Obstetricians, pediatricians, pre-natalists and others should carry pamphlets in their waiting rooms discussing this, and parenting magazines need to publish articles on it, because too many parents are caught off-guard and surprised, and it’s not possible to denigrate a group of people and then say to a child who’s coming out that “it’s okay, you’re my flesh and blood.” A sudden change of heart like that is hard to believe.

Most children will be heterosexual; but, even if that’s what the parents hoped for, it’s the adults’ role to give support to the children, not the children’s to give support to the parents’ dreams. An orientation can’t be changed through fear, or any other way.

Probably only progressive parents will prepare themselves as I’ve suggested, but isn’t the goal to develop a person who’s well-adjusted to self rather than one maladjusted to both self and society?

Mike Varady