As if engaged in some onerous battle with the soul – or, at the very least, the inner child – people tend to want to grow, change and emerge from the struggle of another year gone by. It may be a coincidence that this introspection comes to many following the overly festive, terribly capitalistic and mostly dysfunctional winter holiday season, but somehow the emergence of these intense feelings lead people to want to better themselves in the new year. New Year’s resolutions tend to be slung with little or no true intention, but, at the very least, most people are listening to those inner demons and wanting a little peace of mind.

It is in this nexus of self-motivation that people can really work toward a state of wellness. Of course, wellness in not only about losing a few pounds or being nicer to loved ones; it is a multi-faceted and lovely unfolding of each element that binds us to humanity: our bodies, our spirits, our emotions, our sexuality, our self-esteem and mostly, our ability to allow ourselves deep introspection.

Experts agree that it is important for a cultural group or entity to define health for its own community. This means finding the root causes of unhealthiness; finding what brings wellness to the community and helping all members of the community to fall in line and continuously redefine that definition.

To strive for self-improvement, it is important to embrace changes in all aspects of one’s self. It may be this very reason that New Year’s resolutions fizzle and fade after a few weeks, or, in some cases, a few hours. Each aspect of wellness is interrelated with the others. One cannot affect the body without affecting the spirit, for example. It is up to us as individuals of a disenfranchised segment of society to recognize and make those changes toward a path of self-enlightenment and (gulp) happiness.

Let’s start with physical health. Because of its tangibility, the body seems simple to control – almost as easy as arithmetic. Or is it?

According to a Dec. 19 BBC news report, 64.5 percent of the U.S. adult population is either overweight or obese; and in the U.S., 300,000 deaths per year can be directly linked to obesity-related disease.

While it seems simple to do the math, cut out the sweets and stop taking escalators, people aren’t likely to do it. In fact, shaping the body is really hard work. It takes patience, perseverance, sweat, tears and sacrifice. It is about making smart choices for the body about the chemicals and food put into it as well as the physical strength put into working it.

People tend to set this high up on the New Year’s list because they believe it will fulfill all other elements of wellness. Maybe they want a firmer ass to attract more men or women. Possibly they are concerned about diabetes, heart disease or stroke, but mostly they believe it will ultimately make them a better person.

This isn’t too far from the truth. Besides the benefits of a leaner, healthier body with more regulated hormones and blood sugar (among other aspects), caring for the body, i.e. caring for the self, is a conscious effort and may in fact lead to better self-esteem and mental health in general.

It is not surprising that the GLBT community is obsessed with both physical health and beauty. After all, according to local studies, most members of the community feel completely disenfranchised from the larger community. And to top if off, many feel marginalized from within their own demographic as a GLBT person.

For example, a recent Women’s Health Survey conducted by The Center shows that many women of color within the lesbian community say they do not relate to the community as a whole. In other studies, many GLBTs equally say they do not feel represented in and by the GLBT community. This may in turn cause a slight obsession with looks. After all, how else does one feel part of the “in crowd” but to start looking and sometimes acting like that particular bunch – especially if that particular “in crowd” tends to clock a lot of time at the gym?

This is not to say that this is the only reason for an obsession with looks. Americans in general are fairly consumed with media ideals, and one of the recent ideals happens to be about body image: skinny women and buff men.

Also, it is a stereotype that gay men are the fashion rods for our society. How else did “Queer Eye for the Straight Guy” win such favor than because the heterosexual community sees our taste and particular eye for detail and style as pleasing? To keep in line with this stereotype, many of us subconsciously feel a desire to live up to such an expectation and work to become these perfect “Kens.”

On still another note, gay women may find themselves living up to the “tough girl” image, while many gay men are possibly combating the “sissy boy” image society has dictated for us.

Obviously, there are many reasons people want to look and feel good. Whether this comes from a place of insecurity and ridicule or not, it is important to listen to the desire. Physical health is integral in overall wellness.

Aside from physical beauty, another aspect of physical health is freedom from disease and pain. It is imperative that gay-friendly medical services exist that are sensitive to our health needs, and are provided without discrimination. For example, the Women’s Health Survey found that one in five lesbians are without health insurance or primary doctors. Because they are not being screened for physical problems, their susceptibility to disease is greater.

The California HIV Planning Group/ MSM Task Force also outlines the community’s responsibility for its members’ health: “Gay communities have a responsibility to recognize the elevated levels of drug abuse and addiction among their members and the negative impact on the health and well-being of the community, and advocate for culturally sensitive education and increased access to treatment, recovery and services when warranted.”

Claudia Lucero, coordinator of the Women’s Resource Center at The Center, said it is essential that community members become pro-active about their health. Because many lesbians say their lack of health insurance is the main reason they are not in optimal health, The Center has obtained resources to help all members of the community with financial and other obstacles to prime health, she said.

“They can take an empowered stance on their health; go to doctors’ offices with lists of questions; take a friend with them; use our resources at The Center or ask friends in order to find LGBT affirmative providers,” she said. “Mostly, they should not ignore their health issues because of fear or lack of insurance.”

What does it take to be physically healthy? The experts agree: Diet, exercise and a positive body image are key.

After spending the time and energy on making the body more fit, and caring about food intake, exercise and general health, individuals will soon find that sexual, mental and spiritual health all improve as well.

Sexual health should certainly be a priority for GLBT people, considering the statistics. According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention’s HIV/AIDS Surveillance Report, 47 percent of all HIV/AIDS cases diagnosed in the U.S. from 2001 to 2004 were men who have sex with men (MSM). In essence, two-thirds of all infections in men are from the MSM category, according to the CDC. Thousands of our friends, lovers and colleagues have fallen prey to this ravishing disease, and yet this same community continues to see more and more new cases of HIV every day.

The community also has a high rate of sexually transmitted diseases in general, according to statistics. Many lesbians continue to practice unsafe sex, possibly under the illusion that the main reason people use protection is to avoid pregnancy. Although women who have sex with women have not been infected at nearly the same rate as MSM, they are not immune to HIV and AIDS.

What causes such “disease” in the GLBT community around sexuality? Obviously there is no definitive answer.

Because of the disenfranchisement from society’s mainstream, the daily oppression, the homophobia and the internal homophobia, many people engage in risky behavior. Some believe they are indestructible. Some are so deeply closeted and afraid of who they are that they take sexual risks because of their low self-esteem. Some, under the influence of drugs and alcohol, make terrible choices. Some women believe STDs cannot be transmitted without a penis.

Mostly it comes down to pride and ignorance. The ignorant will continue to fall prey to risky behavior, and the proud will continue to spread and become infected with various diseases because of deep-seated self-loathing and hatred toward homosexuals – even if that means hatred of the self.

The MSM Task Force has recently set forth a framework of wellness for gay men. In this report, they recognize that forces of oppression lead to self-destructive behavior. They believe the community has a responsibility to its members to curb this behavior: “The Task Force believes that one of the best ways to discourage self-destructive behaviors among gay men is to foster value for health and wellness, a sense of worth and self-acceptance.”

How does one become sexually healthy? First, by facing internal homophobia and loving thyself in turn, one becomes attune to risk behaviors and avoids them. Secondly, people simply need to use condoms, gloves and dental dams. Although bareback seems sexier and sharing bodily fluids is very appealing, people need to get smart. Sometimes sexual partners lie. Many times if a person is willing to conduct risky behavior with one partner, they will also do it with other lovers. It only takes one encounter to become infected. That statistic alone should scare this community directly into latex. Thirdly, people need to wake up. People die of AIDS. There is no cure, and dying of a ruthless disease is certainly not sexy.

In the GLBT community, mental health has been under attack for decades, if not centuries of civilization. It was only in the last couple of decades that the American Psychiatric Association finally freed us from the status of “mentally insane.” We are daily faced with a barrage of attacks on our families and our right to be together. When we march in parades, we see the picketers with their “Fags Go to Hell” signs. When we enroll our children in school, we have to ask whether or not the school and its instructors are anti-gay, and really read their body language.

Voters take our issues to the polls and vote against us. Our leaders announce to the world that they believe we should not have the right to marriage – and, in turn, the right to create our own families.

Many, if not all, of us experience a deep longing to feel connected to society at large, according to the Women’s Needs Assessment, and yet continue to feel fragmented, “unimportant, neglected and invisible.” In fact, 31 percent of the test subjects in the assessment reported having mental health issues.

This is all very risky business. We have to have hearts of steel and courage unsurpassed just to make it through an hour of television. We are constantly attacked on a mental and sometimes physical level, and we all know that we are at risk at some moment just because of who we are and who we love.

That’s a lot of spider webs to carry around. Even for those who have come out of the closet, that door doesn’t just stay open. It has to open and open and creak and purr until one day we can actually move into the living room.

The most important lesson is to know oneself. Homosexuality is not a phase, and it is not a sin. According to recent studies, we are not diseased or mentally ill, and we do not molest children or rape Boy Scouts any more than heterosexual people do.

We should take care of our bodies and our spirits, and should constantly keep the dialogue open between all of us. A lesbian and a gay man may have nothing in common except that one thing that binds us to this community: our ability to love across gender lines. That is important to realize and recognize, and we should constantly remind ourselves that we do have this in common.

And if it’s still too tough to deal with, go to therapy. There are several gay-friendly counselors in San Diego and many, many support groups for any such cause – whether you are butch/femme, a bear, a dyke, a youth, a walker, a volunteer, etc. (Visit the Gay & Lesbian Times resource guide online at www.gaylesbiantimes.com or The Center’s Web site, www.thecentersd.org, for a listing of community resources.) There’s a pot of gold at every end of the rainbow. Let’s spend it!

Spiritual health does not necessarily mean religious health. Somebody once defined the spirit as “a fundamental emotional and activating principle determining one’s character,” according to wordreference.com. The spirit is sort of the voice within: the one that makes the decisions; the one that chooses to use or not to use morality; the one that serves the conscience of the being. The spirit is fragile and elusive, and it should be nurtured and soothed on a regular basis.

How does one achieve such spiritual health? It really depends on the person. For some, being involved in charity is tremendously fulfilling. Some people enjoy reading or ice skating or creating art of some form. Others like to attend churches or synagogues or other religious institutions. Some people find spiritual strength in nature or in journaling.

Spiritual health comes from listening to what is within; following one’s own moral barometer and, obviously, committing all acts under scrutiny of the conscience.

Because we are ostracized from most religious factions, it is difficult for many of us to find a clear path toward spiritual health. Many people rely on a spiritual leader to find that level of wellness and to define those values unique to the self, which make up the spirit. Without that community or mentor, it is difficult to comprehend the self and the universe at large.

We have a unique duty to ourselves and to each other to create those safe GLBT places and to constantly combat the religious and spiritual discrimination we are forced to endure on a daily basis. For those who cannot find spiritual health within the self, there are GLBT-friendly religious leaders of all walks in San Diego who are there to help people onto that path. Connecting to the community can help individuals find that spiritual and/or religious path.

After all, spiritual health must be unique to the individual, and must certainly be recognized and respected for all its diversity within the GLBT community as a whole.

Community health is probably the most difficult to truly grasp. For many, understanding that “what affects the one affects the whole” is like trying to understand the meaning of life. For others, it is easy to recognize the need for community wellness and the need for all spokespersons to be present when decisions are made for the community. Although the GLBT culture can never agree on every aspect of wellness due to the sheer magnitude of its diversity, there needs to be an opening, or a chance for dialogue, for the community to serve its true purpose.

The MSM Task Force urges GLBT people to fight for the right of wellness for all its members, and to especially concentrate on mentoring gay youth to move toward wellness and away from self-destructive behavior.

“Recognizing that reducing all forms of discrimination will improve gay men’s health, the Task Force urges support to those who fight for social justice and that it is included as a value and goal to any health initiative for this population,” they state.

The Women’s Needs Assessment also recognizes this crucial community contribution: “Feeling connected to one’s own community improves a community member’s sense of self-worth, improves access to and awareness of available resources, reduces health risk behaviors and contributes to overall health and happiness.”

Community does not only exist because people have something in common. It serves as a voice and as a refuge, and cannot exist without cooperation from its members.

Men have a responsibility to women to be inclusive and supportive of their ideas and voices, and women need to recognize that men share in the same sort of oppression from the main society. All members need to recognize that race, class, gender and sex all contribute to special perspectives and circumstances that affect all members of this community, whether we agree with those voices or not.

Our community will only become whole when it recognizes that the foundation is based on love, and that every aspect of a strong house – from the molding to the wiring to the furniture to the wall paint – contributes to the loveliness of the home. Because of our diversity, not just in taste but even in sexuality and gender, we have a lot to offer each other – and not just negative feedback.

When it comes down to it, the right wing attacks all of us because of our desire, our souls and our passion. Why should we destroy or disrespect each other when we already have a majority of the country doing it for us?

The community could be a refuge. It could be a meeting place. It could even be a home, if we could just learn to open our hearts and our minds to the possibility that our own experiences are not paramount.

This is how we achieve true wellness as a community.

A path to wellness can clearly be set before each and every one of us, if we are only willing to embrace it. With all of the love, compassion, drama, hurt feelings, unique human experience, creativity and friendship we can all bring to the mix, we are bound to find a way to help each other make it through the dysfunctional and hurtful ways of the world. It is our community’s responsibility to really strive for wellness and to provide a pathway for others who feel unable to make such a leap.

The larger community will not take care of us, no matter how much we want them or expect them to. We have to put aside our differences and our fears, and really listen to each other. It is only at that point that we can achieve true wellness. It is only at that point that we can realistically obtain a healthy lifestyle as GLBT Americans.

Beach Area Community Clinic

3705 Mission Blvd., San Diego, CA 92109

(619) 488-0644

Central Region Public Health Center

5202 University Ave., San Diego, CA 92105

(619) 229-5400

Clean Needle Exchange Program

(619) 602-2763

County Health Services Complex

3851 Rosecrans St., San Diego, CA 92110

(619) 692-8550

HIV, STD & Hepatitis Branch of Public Health Services

(619) 296-3400

East San Diego Health Center

5202 University Ave., San Diego, CA 92105

(619) 229-7990

Family Health Centers of San Diego

(619) 515-2300

www.fhcsd.org

The Gay Men’s Health Clinic

3544 30th St., San Diego, CA 92104

(619) 515-2424

Human Rights Clinic

3990 Old Town Ave. C201, San Diego, CA 92110

(619) 278-2405

www.doctorsoftheworld.org

Imperial Beach Community Clinic

154 Palm Ave., San Diego, CA 92118

(619) 429-3733

The Lesbian Health Clinic (Progressive Health Services)

2141 El Cajon Blvd., San Diego, CA 92104

(619) 260-0810

www.progressivehealth.org

Linda Vista Health Center

6973 Linda Vista Rd., San Diego, CA 92111

(619) 279-0925

Logan Heights Family Health Center

1809 National Ave., San Diego, CA 92113

(619) 515-2300

Naval Medical Center San Diego (Balboa Navy Hospital)

34800 Bob Wilson Dr., San Diego, CA 92134

(619) 532-6400

www.nmcsd.med.navy.mil

North Central Public Health Center

2440 Grand Ave., San Diego, CA 92109

(858) 490-4400

North Park Family Health Center

(619) 515-2424

www.fhcsd.org/npfhc.html

Our House – Comprehensive Health Center

286 Euclid Ave. Suite 308, San Diego, CA 92114

(619) 527-7390

Public Health Services – Fifth Avenue

3028 Fifth Ave., San Diego, CA 92103

(619) 296-2120

Rosecrans Public Health Center

3851 Rosecrans St., San Diego, CA 92110

(619) 692-8550

San Diego County Immunization Initiative

(619) 692-8661

www.immunization-sd.org

The San Diego Psychological Association

2535 Camino del Rio South Suite 220, San Diego, CA 92108

(619) 297-4825

www.sdpsych.org

San Diego American Indian Health Center

2630 First Ave., San Diego, CA 92103

(619) 234-0648 or (619) 234-2158

www.sdaihc.com

San Diego County Department of Health Services, Askew Clinic

1700 Pacific Highway Rm. 107, San Diego, CA 92101

(619) 692-8550

San Ysidro Health Center

4004 Beyer Blvd., San Ysidro, CA 92173

(619) 428-4463

www.syhc.org

SEAR

324 N. 47th St., San Diego, CA 92102

(619) 264-7351

Southeast Public Health Center

3177 Ocean View Blvd., San Diego, CA 92113

(619) 231-9300

UCSD Owen Clinic

(619) 543-3995

www.health.ucsd.edu

Vista Community Clinic

1000 Vale Terrace, Vista, CA 92084

(760) 631-5000 ext. 1135 or (760) 421-0408

www.vistacommunityclinic.org