Dear Editor:

Like many, I am disturbed at San Diego LGBT Pride Board’s decision to restrict minors not accompanied by a parent or guardian from the Pride Festival at Balboa Park. They cite “liability concerns” for their decision. Since alcohol and fetish exhibits are confined to adult-only areas, I do not understand the Committee’s rationale…or “irrationale.”

This sends the wrong message to youth who are wrestling with gender preference without family support. GLBT individuals know of this struggle and impact to their self-esteem. The Pride Festival is a vital link…if they were allowed to attend.

The Festival is a demonstration of our pride and solidarity, of who we are despite the oppression bestowed on us by others driven by religious and short-sighted convictions. It enables us to shrug off the deception that was once a mode of survival. Nothing about the Festival warrants the exclusion of minors who lack the support of a parent or guardian.

Restricting unaccompanied minors infers that Pride Festival will expose youth to a risky or potentially harmful situation and denies them a validating experience. Going to school, attending a dance, socializing with peers is far riskier than paying for admission and crossing the Festival’s threshold to a world of like-minded, empathetic individuals.

With proper leadership by the Pride Board, the liability for minors should be no greater than any other risks inherent in hosting a paid event. The decision to enact this divisive, poorly-strategized policy contradicts the all-inclusive nature of Pride. In a lawsuit-happy society, organizations must be vigilant in minimizing legal risk but cannot eliminate all lawsuit potential, no matter who they bar from admission. And the educational and psychological benefit to a GLBT youth outweighs any liability.

Further, enforcement of this policy will be difficult, if not impossible, to administer. During the onslaught of attendees at the start of the Festival, are the admittance volunteers going to check legal documents to verify that a minor is accompanied by their parent or legal guardian? If they don’t, and one of the Committee’s conjured-up “liability concerns” becomes reality, then the LGBT Board incurs a bigger liability for having a policy that wasn’t properly enforced.

The responsibility for restricting a minor’s participation at Pride or other event rests with the parent or guardian, not the Pride Board. The Board’s policy fuels adversaries who perceive us as deviant enough that we must prevent a minor without a parent from participating.

600 individuals signed a petition objecting to the Committee’s decision and many have decided to abstain from the Festival.

Let the GLBT Pride Board and their sponsors know of your disagreement. Alienating individuals who can benefit from the Festival is counterproductive to the purpose of the event. The Board should foster an all-inclusive, welcoming community for anyone who is inspired by LGBT Pride.

Tim Reynal

Dear Editor:

Can “congratulations” and “thank you” be used at the same time? Let me give it a shot.

I just finished reading your new column by Sgt. Bob. The Gay & Lesbian Times has done a good job in keeping us informed as to various issues and lifestyles that either make up or affect our community – and “Military Maneuvers” is a welcome addition. No matter how we feel about the war or the administration that felt a need to start it, there are many men and women in our community who have volunteered to serve our country – and like those who have served before them – they deserve our respect and our gratitude.

In the past six years working at the S.A.G.E. Center, I have met many S.A.G.E. members who are veterans. And like those who currently serve, they had to live under the “Don’t ask, Don’t Tell” policy. Their stories of balancing who they are with their willingness to serve our country are ones that I will always remember.

One of the values my Dad taught me was not only to respect what our flag stands for, but to respect and honor those who are willing to serve our country and, if necessary, to give their life to protect our freedoms. “Military Maneuvers” is a great opportunity not only to reach out to GLBT veterans and active duty members, but to remind all of us that, behind the politics, there are members in our community who have – and who are still willing – to put their lives on the line for their country.

So to Michael Portantino, Russell O’Brien and Bob Lehman, “congratulations” on your new column, and “thank you” for your continued efforts to keep us informed.

Tom Kirkman

Executive Director

The S.A.G.E. Center

Dear Editor:

Dear San Diego Pride Board,

Thank you for all the hard work and devotion you have invested in our community. Pride is a wonderful time of year for us to reflect on our past, acknowledge our present, and aspire to an even better future. We look forward each year to using this time to amplify our mission of promulgating universal joy.

Every year, people gather across the continents at events just like ours to celebrate the diversity of the GLBT family. Everyone is invited and everyone is welcomed, no questions asked. Sadly, opponents often try to derail our celebration, but we continue to rise above and show the world that we are a beautiful part of the human race and we are not going anywhere. Sometimes, though, we respond to our detractors in self-destructive ways by internalizing their prejudices, and this often occurs without our even realizing it.

We, The Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, call this negative effect “stigmatic guilt.” It is roughly defined as the feeling one gets when one measures his/her worth against a behavioral, moral, and value standard not of one’s own making. When these external standards are internally validated, the resulting feelings of low self-esteem and self-doubt can be horribly destructive mentally, physically, and socially. It can occur on both personal and community-wide levels. Many religions, social organizations, and peer groups inflict stigmatic guilt on a regular basis, whether they be gay or straight.

We find that Pride 2006 itself is reinforcing stigmatic guilt by barring unescorted youth from partaking in the majority of the pride festival. This policy implies that there is something inherent about our gay community that is dangerously harmful to minors. The very name “Pride” is meant to give us a positive sense of who we are. However, this new policy of the San Diego Pride Board says that there is something about who we are that should engender shame, something from which youth must be shielded.

Other Prides around the country do not adopt this policy, nor do other festivals within San Diego. Why should our celebration be treated differently? Surely, more palatable solutions could be found to include our youth in this focal celebration of GLBT life. Perhaps allow admission to the festival at no charge and solicit donations instead? Or hire professional security services instead of relying on volunteers? As representatives of the GLBT community, you owe it to Pride supporters and attendees to outline your reasons for adopting this draconian policy and to pursue suggestions for keeping our youth included as much as possible.

We extend to you an invitation to meet with us and other community representatives so we can come to understand why these decisions have been made and how they may be improved. Please feel free to contact us so that we may help you to expiate this stigmatic guilt before it does further harm to our community.

The San Diego Sisters