I have a prediction that from now ’til election time, the terror alert (real or not) will be raised several times. Not only will this cover the administration’s behind, but it will keep the nation in fear to gain votes for Mr. Bush. It’s a foolproof plan and it’s brilliant! … The Olympics will begin this weekend in Athens. If there was a queer Neilsen’s rating, I’m sure that swimming and gymnastics will rank highest in viewership … Jamaican singer Beenie Man agreed to drop two homophobic songs from his concert after a threatened demonstration in Philly. I don’t see the FCC doing anything about this. But then, I’m not surprised. It’s only homophobic, not a costume malfunction! … The Republican Convention will be held in New York City in a few weeks. I think we should have secret cameras in every gay club and every sex club so that we can “punk” a few of them Bible-toting Republicans … My heart palpitates every time I see Nick, Craig and Ryan Karshner on TV. They’re the Cingular triplets and I would love to see them in an Abercrombie & Fitch book. An amateur sex tape would be even better… I have finally registered to vote in California. I’ve been voting by absentee ballot in New York. So I’ve just earned the right to bitch louder. To me, this is more important than my gay card. Are you a registered voter? … Eighteen months ago, I wrote in my first column that I am looking for a Marine. Recently I met one at the Brass Rail. And you know what? I think he’s a keeper!

This past weekend, Chris Horton and Lala Too were crowned Emperor and Empress of the Imperial Court de San Diego at the Wyndham Emerald Plaza Hotel. Sixteen out-of-town courts were in attendance at the ball, bidding a grand farewell to Emperor Robi Cox and Empress Cristina Monet. Chris and Lala have been together for the past six years and have been an integral part of the court. Chris was president of the board until he stepped down early this year to campaign. Lala is part of the strong “Filipino Mafia” headed by Empress Jhigs, that is one of the cornerstones of the court. The festivities started on Friday, Aug. 6, with the Tijuana Party at Bourbon Street, and the New York Party at Bacchus House. Both events raised money for the Tijuana AIDS Fund. It culminated with a victory brunch at Martini’s on Sunday, Aug. 8, to mark the beginning of Reign XXXIII. Everyone is invited to become members of the XXXIII reign by coming to the Imperial Court meeting at The Center on Wednesday, Aug. 18, at 7:30 p.m. Come early, at 6:30 p.m., for dinner. Here wishing the best to Chris and Lala for the year ahead.

Marcovicci at Schroeder’s Cabaret

Andrea Marcovicci, “the Callas of Cabaret,” (The Philadelphia Inquirer) will be performing at Schroeder’s Club and Cabaret as part of a weekend-long fundraising effort on behalf of the Disabled American Veterans. The money raised will be used toward a new van specially equipped for use by veterans being transported to and from the VA Hospital. I’ve had the opportunity to enjoy this cabaret legend at the famed Algonquin Hotel in New York. New York Magazine hailed Ms. Marcovicci as “…the most throbbingly irresistible voice in cabaret,” while Stephen Holden wrote in the New York Times that she has “… an incandescent enthusiasm and a masterly balance between poignancy and wit.” Andrea will be performing on Friday, Sept. 10, and Saturday, Sept. 11, at 8:00 p.m.; and Sunday, Sept. 12, at 3:00 p.m. Schroeder’s Club and Cabaret is located at the Westin Horton Plaza, 910 Broadway Circle. Call (858) 794-9044 for tickets. If you like the songs of Irving Berlin, Kurt Weil and Kern, you’ll love Andrea Marcovicci.

Join Immigration Equality and Marriage Equality California for a night of fine dining that will benefit the GLBT community on Thursday, Aug. 19. Come to the kick-off party at California Cuisine from 5:00 to 6:30 p.m., then enjoy dinner at one of the participating restaurants, which include The Abbey Café, Hamburger Mary’s, California Cuisine and Indulgence Café and Bakery. All of these restaurants have pledged to donate a portion of their day’s gross receipts to the Marriage Equality Caravan, an eight-day, 14-stop bus tour across America to promote equal partnership rights for same sex couples. Visit my column online at www.gaylesbiantimes.com for a link to their website.

First MTV announces the launching of LOGO, the new gay cable programming. Now, NBC Universal has announced its plans to add a weekly gay programming block to its schedule. The OUTzone will launch on Saturday, Sept. 18, with a “Dame Edna” marathon, season two of “Kath & Kim” and various films, documentaries and music specials. Over at MTV/LOGO, Cher and Chastity will be hosting “Family Outing”, a series about celebrity coming out of the closet; Alan Cumming has signed on for a musical cabaret series and Margaret Cho gets to star in her own series. Kathy Griffin will play “Julie” for “Fantastic Voyage”, a real-life “Love Boat” on board an ocean liner in the Caribbean. There is even a wedding-themed series hosted by actor Scott Thompson, “My Fabulous Gay Wedding”. Pretty soon, Will Truman will just be a memory from the past.

Castrobear Productions, creators of Lazy Bear Weekend, in association with L.L. Bear present the much-anticipated “Sweat Party” on Saturday, Aug. 21. Making its San Diego debut, this 12-hour sweat dance marathon starts at Rich’s at 8:00 p.m. and will feature the sexy, sweaty sounds of New York City’s DJ John LePage until 2:00 a.m. Then from 2:00 to 8:00 a.m., the “After-hours Sweat Party” will continue at Shooterz, featuring DJ Chris O from Palm Springs. (Alcohol sales will resume at 6:00 a.m. at Shooterz.) This will be a huge event, featuring two DJs and two venues for one great night! Ticket price for both parties $25, and will only be available the night of the event. You may purchase tickets for one or both parties.

If you do not mind the 100-degree dry heat of Palm Springs, Villa Mykonos is one of Palm Springs’ best-kept secrets. The perfect romantic getaway for friends and lovers, both men and women can enjoy the spacious condominium and townhouse units, fully furnished and equipped with everything you could want. With a sparkling pool and Jacuzzi, why even leave the premises? For more information, call Gary at (800) 471-4753.

There’s a new hot spot in town, the Blue Lotus Lounge, right next door to Parallel 33 at 741 West Washington in Mission Hills. Parallel 33 Owner Robert Butterfield had the adjacent building painted in a tranquil blue, and has provided the inside with hip decor. With a funky house DJ, Thursday nights are popular for meeting old friends and making new ones. You can even throw a private party, by giving Robert a call at (619) 260-0033.

Girls, girls, girls – the generic type. That’s what you’ll find Saturday nights at The Flame, speaking of hot spots! Check out Candy, the hot girls’ night with two dance floors and two really cool bars. If you are just a “girlie man” or a hot stud, Bad Puppy is Friday boys’ night. It looks like The Flame is back and better than ever!

Bourbon Street has a new night, too. $2 Tuesdays, featuring $2 drinks from 9:00 p.m. to close. Drinks are only $1 with a college or military ID, and there’s karaoke in the main bar.

On Saturday, Aug.14, Club PAPI returns to Rich’s for the PAPI VIP Party! Everyone in attendance will receive a new PAPI VIP card, good for discounts and free admission at clubs all over California. Granada Entertainment and BMG Latin present the official CD release party for Alejandra Guzman, with the first 500 people receiving her free CD! Also at Rich’s, the second and fourth Thursday of each month is U-Turn, a bi-weekly event dedicated to the serious house music freak. The eclectic format of U-Turn includes deep soulful house, Latin beats and some special live performances. Rotating residents of U-Turn are local house-scene DJs Brian Cabalic, Anthony Orlando and DL Ala. The cover is $3.