Description: A no-preservative tomato and red pepper soup contained in a 32-ounce paper carton with plastic pour spout.

Preparation summary: Shake well. Pour desired amount into bowl, then heat and serve.

Highpoints: Rich and velvety consistency and excellent flavor resembles well-made bisque. Roasted red pepper undertones prove to be the missing element in all commercial tomato soups that have come before it.

Lowpoints: Tempts you into eating too many grilled cheese sandwiches.

Average retail price: $2.49

Availability: Trader Joe’s

Description: Twelve frozen, pre-battered “pollock and/or cod” fillets, which, according to the box, are “selected from icy ocean waters.”

Preparation summary: Place desired amount of fillets on baking sheet and heat in oven for 15 to 17 minutes.

Highpoints: The tails, heads and bones have been removed, and they’re a little plumper and crispier than fish sticks.

Lowpoints: You’ll need to douse these greasy, compressed fillets in lemon juice, tartar sauce and a can of hearty ale before realizing that you’re eating beer-battered fish. Product is salty, and contains enough sprayed-on oil to saturate the fillets all the way through.

Average retail price: $6.39

Availability: Most major grocery stores

Description: Locally produced jarred pickles with hot peppers, onions, vinegar, sugar and spices.

Preparation summary: Ready to eat

Highpoints: Heavenly crisp and blistering hot, while maintaining the sweet flavors from the vinegar and onions. These fiery cucumbers get people talking when added onto the cruditè platter. Perfect revenge food for enemies with wussy taste buds.

Lowpoints: For pickles, they’re expensive.

Average retail price: $15.95

Availability: Hot Licks/Seaport Village

Description: Box contains two “new and improved” flour burritos filled with eggs, American cheese and bits of breakfast sausage.

Preparation summary: Wrap in paper towel and microwave on high for one and a half to two minutes. Let cool one minute before eating. (Note: Instructions fail to indicate if preparation applies to one or both burritos.)

Highpoints: If you’re into cheap, pre-made breakfast burritos, you can essentially spare yourself a trip to McDonald’s.

Lowpoints: Jimmy Dean should stay out of our microwaves and stick to frying pans. Dry and gnarly tortillas turn out deathly dry, perhaps because the paper towel needed to wrap each burrito sticks to them. Cheese is undetectable, the amount of sausage skimpy and the scrambled eggs are what you’d expect when they’re made weeks ahead in a factory and then frozen.

Average retail price: $3.49

Availability: Most major grocery stores