Two statements that you never see quoted consecutively by a sandwich shop owner are, “We make the best cheesesteaks on the planet” followed by, “We’re not from Philadelphia.” Call it a culinary offense, a media blooper or a bluntly honest disclosure by three native-California siblings who founded Gaglione Brothers in Loma Portal and revealed to another newspaper their deviate claim.

In multiple visits I paid to the shop, brothers Andy, Joe and Tony were missing in action – perhaps tending to their newest location in Mission Beach. So I relied on a friendly male staff member of skateboarding age to guide me through the shop’s back-East-style litany of submarines, hogies and “best” you-know-what.

“What’s so special about your cheesesteaks?” I asked.

“Uh, the chopped meat we use is, like, really great quality,” he answered. “We get it from U.S. Foods.”

“And the rolls?” I continued. “Where are they from?”

“Phil the bread guy. He makes desserts mostly, but bakes the bread just for us and delivers it every morning.”

Pinched with intrigue, my companion and I got right down to business with a 12-inch Mushroom Cheesesteak, which didn’t disappoint, but didn’t deliver us to nirvana, either. The roll was good and chewy with a dusting of cornmeal on its underbelly. But compared to the plump cheesesteaks you’ll find all over Philly, the finely chopped meat weighed in frugally and barely pushed apart the bread.

Melted white American cheese plasters many of the sandwiches here and leaves a rich sticky coating in the mouth that is satiating to some and off-putting to others. On the Diego, it imparted fat and creaminess to a lean grilled chicken breast slathered in grilled onions, jalapenos, lettuce and tomatoes. Yet when embedded into the cheesesteaks, which vary according to their doctorings (you can get ’em with grilled jalapenos, lettuce and tomato, Cheez Whiz or onions), I found myself whimpering for Provolone instead.

More noteworthy is The Turk, a cheeseless torpedo dribbling with pulled homemade turkey breast, sagey stuffing, cranberry sauce and mayo. The turkey was no less fresh and tasty as meat picked off the carcass on Thanksgiving night. And Phil’s fresh, springy sub rolls get showcased particularly well in this combination.

Judging from The Buffalo, it seems the Gaglione brothers hold a place in their hearts for the northeast. Vinegary chicken tenders coated in Frank’s Hot Sauce get tucked into a grabable submarine sandwich laced with lettuce, tomatoes and, at last, Provolone cheese. A little butter in the sauce, however, would’ve helped quell the tartness and bring the chicken to authentic status.

In dire need of toning down, however, are the garlic fries – so powerful and overloaded with minced garlic, my companion had to push them to the far end of our table if we were to continue with undistracted conversation. On another visit, the atmosphere was strained by an endless set of head-banging rock music played over a local radio station, which ruined even the cheap thrill of eating fries topped this time with Cheez Whiz.

Other specialty subs include the Turkey Club with bacon, avocado and Swiss cheese, the General made of hot pastrami and Russian dressing, and the Chicken Ranch filled with cubed breast meat, bacon, ranch dressing and, yes, more melted white American cheese. There are also cheesesteak fries, which are good and goopy. And for those who never knew that orange soda contains caffeine, the drink station here dispenses a decaffeinated brand that tastes as saccharine-sweet as any.

The shop is small, with a bright, clean feel and black-and-white tiled flooring that pops from florescent lighting. Seating is limited to about five tables inside and a few more on the sidewalk. Yet despite its casual atmosphere that feels a lot like Newport Avenue in Ocean Beach, the noontime fanfare of suit-and-tie business folk seems persistent.

Gaglione Brothers resides in the Midway Town Center plaza along with a few other non-chain eateries such as Embers Grille, Kobe Sushi and Natural Chicken. A sign above the order counter, however, touts franchise opportunities, which could mean the arrival of Philly-style cheesesteaks with truthful California roots coming soon to a neighborhood near you.