The measure of changing seasons need not be calculated by how many leaves have cascaded gently to the ground or by the chill that resonates through the air and into your bones. It can be clearly illustrated by the types of movies playing at your local Cineplex.

Gone are the days of big-budget, special-effects driven fare. More thought-provoking films are being ushered down the red carpet this season.

The big guns (and, no, I am not referring to that ’80s porn chestnut) this fall include films starring Leonardo DiCaprio, Nicole Kidman, Matt Damon, Brad Pitt and Daniel Craig as the new James Bond. There are also some gay-themed films on the slate, and what will arguably be the gayest of them all: Dreamgirls.

Two Hollywood hotties, Leonardo DiCaprio and Matt Damon, star in The Departed, a story about “an undercover cop who goes deep inside the mob and a gangster who penetrates the police force.” Unfortunately, this isn’t as sexual as it sounds on paper, and the only coupling of note on the film is that of DiCaprio and director Martin Scorsese; this is their third joint venture. The Departed also stars Jack Nicholson, Mark Wahlberg and Martin Sheen.

Flags of Our Fathers is a WWII drama directed by Clint Eastwood about the six soldiers who planted a U.S. flag atop Iwo Jima. Not to sound flippant (who, me?) about such serious subject matter, but I have six words for gay moviegoers: Ryan. Phillippe. In. A. Sailor. Suit. Talk about getting the prize of eye candy from the Cracker Jack box!

Running With Scissors is based on the memoir by Augusten Burroughs about the time his mother sent him to live with her shrink and his rather colorful (i.e. crazy) family when he was a teenager. In the film, Joseph Cross is Burroughs, Brian Cox (the screen’s first Hannibal Lecter, in 1986’s Manhunter) is his shrink (I’d pass on his invites to dinner) and Annette Bening is Burroughs’ bipolar mother. That’s not the only bi category she falls into, as there were a few dalliances with both women and her sexuality in the book, and Burroughs is gay himself. But you might not know that from the previews, which gloss over those pertinent facts. At any rate, Bening better pray that Hilary Swank, her arch nemesis come Oscar season, doesn’t have any high-caliber films coming soon to a theater near you!

Jude Law stars in Breaking and Entering along with Juliet Binoche and Robin Wright Penn. Law is constantly being burgled and falls for the mother of the boy who’s robbing him.

Marie Antoinette is the movie that got booed at the Cannes Film Festival by French critics. Why, you might ask? Well, I know that while Siouxsie and the Banshees songs are now considered classics, I’m pretty sure they weren’t around in the 18th century. Neither were blue Converse shoes like those sported by star Kirsten Dunst. Perhaps director Sofia Coppola watched Britney Spears ruminate about time travel on YouTube and thought she made sense?

Brad Pitt stars in Babel, which right-wing conservatives probably liken to his recent proclamation that he and Angelina Jolie won’t wed until everyone has the right to do so.

Hedwig and the Angry Inch auteur John Cameron Mitchell takes us on the Shortbus (great, there goes another potential autobiography title!). The stops this bus makes involve actors engaging in real sex. Talk about taking a ride!

Stop me if you’ve heard this one: A flamboyant author travels to a small town to write a true-crime book. Hey, that sounds like last year’s Capote! This year, it’s Infamous, with Toby Jones as Truman Capote and Sandra Bullock as Harper Lee.

Speaking of the gays… Pulitzer Prize-winning playwright Tony Kushner’s life will be on display (much like his work) in Wrestling With Angels. And The House of Adam, another gay-themed film, deals with a closeted police officer investigating his lover’s death.

There are also the requisite cheap thrills waiting to be had with sequels to The Texas Chainsaw Massacre, Saw and The Grudge.

When I think of comedy, there’s one man that immediately springs to mind – Russell Crowe? Umm, well, he’s re-teaming with Gladiator director Ridley Scott (another “comedy vet”) for the comedy A Good Year. Disclaimer: No phones were hurt in the making of this film.

Seriously, when I think of belly laughs, Christopher Guest’s movies get my vote as laugh riots. The usual suspects – Parker Posey, Catherine O’Hara, Eugene Levy, Harry Shearer, Jennifer Coolidge, Fred Willard et al – are lined up to take on the world of acting in For Your Consideration.

Heath Ledger has his first post-Brokeback role in Candy. This time, he’s fallen for a horse of a different color – heroin.

The History Boys details the coming-of-age experience at a British school and features Samuel Barnett (a-dor-able) as the youth coming to grips with his sexuality. Sounds naughty!

Nicole Kidman stars as Diane Arbus, photographer of the strange, in the even stranger named Fur. And it gets weirder still: This is not a biopic, per se, but a fantasy that depicts what Arbus’ life may have been like. OK…

An all-star cast including Anthony Hopkins, Demi Moore, Laurence Fishburne, Elijah Wood and even Lindsay Lohan headline Bobby, a film about Robert Kennedy that is directed by former brat-packer Emilio Estevez. Moore and Estevez are former flames, and she’s still chummy with ex Bruce Willis. That Ashton Kutcher is one understanding guy!

Casino Royale is Daniel Craig’s first foray into “Bond, James Bond” territory, and will chronicle Bond’s first double-O mission – as a blond, James blond.

Volver is the newest import from Pedro Almodóvar and stars Penelope Cruz.

Here’s a math equation for you. Beyoncé Knowles plus a musical based upon The Supremes, times director Bill Condon (Gods & Monsters) equals super gay! The film also stars Eddie Murphy, Jennifer Hudson, Anika Noni Rose and Jamie Foxx (if he starts showing up everywhere, like he did after Ray, channeling Miss Ross, I wouldn’t be too surprised).

While we’re on the subject of gay, there are three releases set for December. Eating Out 2 is the first-ever gay sequel about a gay man who convinces his straight friend to pretend to be gay to get a girl. Race You to the Bottom chronicles a bisexual man’s affair with a woman. Mr. Leather is a documentary following contestants in their quest to become the titular Mr. Leather.

Charlotte’s Web is getting a stylized CGI makeover, with Julia Roberts as the voice of Charlotte, Oprah Winfrey as Gussy, Steve Buscemi taking on the vocals formerly occupied by Paul Lynde as Templeton and co-starring lil’ Dakota Fanning as Fern.

Rounding out the holiday season are: Rocky Balboa (dude, give it up!), The Good German with George Clooney, The Good Shepherd starring Angelina Jolie and Matt Damon (maybe they should have combined these last two films as The Good German Shepherd), and Miss Potter with Renee Zellweger.

Well, there it is; your fall movie preview. And those were only the ones I could fit in! Until next time, that’s all the news that’s fit to print.